[Disclaimer: This article is satire, or what we used to call "fake news" before actual fake news started poisoning the political discourse!]
The mentally challenged battle over use of “retard” in public comments
Ann Coulter is taking plenty of heat for her use of the word “retard” to describe President Obama. Word of the slur caught Sarah Palin by surprise and, while one of Coulter’s biggest fans, Palin said she had to stay true to herself and her family by publicly admonishing her.
“No seriously, Ann, you idiot, you’re still my BFF,” continued Palin as she smiled and winked at the cameras.
“If I didn’t know any better,” said Palin, “I’d think you have the IQ of an imbecile.”
Asked what she thought of Palin’s public flogging of her, Coulter simply responded “Say what you want about that back-woods bimbo,” and left it at that.
In a related news item just this morning, Ann Coulter lashed out at the people who bought her book and who are now asking for their money back.
“What a bunch of losers,” said Coulter as she ducked back inside her home to retrieve her ugly stick to beat off the reporters.
“There are about a gazillion new books out there — some of them with mostly pictures and very little writing — yet these idiots are more interested in what I have to say than someone who actually deserves to be on the NYT best-sellers list.”
Coulter pushed further. “I gotta say that the America I helped to shape is definitely not disappointing me. When dimwits who can’t even read plunk down the ten or so bucks it costs to get a copy of my new book, I have to laugh at the absurdity. 99% of them can’t even spell demagoguery.”
Asked if she wasn’t worried her attack on her fans will cost her dearly in book sales, Coulter replied “Are you kidding? Those numskulls love me no matter what drivel comes out of my mouth!”
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