[Disclaimer: This article is satire, or what we used to call "fake news" before actual fake news started poisoning the political discourse!]
“Mitt” set to debut on Netflix
A new documentary entitled “Mitt,” about the 2012 Republican presidential nominee, is set to debut on Netflix on January 24th.
The documentary promises to show a “humble” Mitt Romney who even let the filmmakers show him in his bathrobe at a Radisson hotel. However, the film will also highlight Romney’s “Latin phase.”
While campaigning in Florida in 2012, the thoroughly light-skinned Romney’s face suddenly turned a Latino brown. Romney admitted in a Univision interview that he has been digging deep into the music of authentic Latino artists such as Ricky Martin and Jennifer Lopez. He also stated that he has been taking guiro lessons and has been jamming with the likes of Carlos Santana.
He added in the interview that his wife, Anne, hopes he will learn how to play Santana’s classic song “Black Magic Woman.” He admits that the song conflicted with his Mormon faith. However, Romney said that he can’t resist shaking his hips to the Latin beat.
The documentary also features Romney negotiating with singer Shakira to use her song “Hips Don’t Lie” for his Florida campaign.
Romney was said to have been wanting to use the slogan “Romney Doesn’t Lie, and Neither Does His Hips” in a TV commercial with Romney and his wife breaking into a Lambada dance at the end. However, Shakira ultimately denied Romney’s request to use her song and stated it’s “too much white people dancing to be taken seriously.”
Romney lost his 2012 bid to become president, and his brown face slowly turned into a sullen white as he watched the election results unfold on Fox News that faithful night with his trusty guiro in his hand.
The filmmakers behind “Mitt” said that Romney will never forget trying to connect with the Latino culture in the few days he spent in Florida and they hope the documentary will cast Mitt Romney in a different color.
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