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[Disclaimer: This article is satire, or what we used to call "fake news" before actual fake news started poisoning the political discourse!]

Bristol Palin to Launch Online Unwed Teen Mom Channel

Jul 282014
 By , July 28, 2014

Finally, help for unwed teen moms from a real expert

Many have heard about Sarah Palin announcing the launch of her own online news channel. The channel will be $9.95 a month and is free to active duty U.S. soldiers.

Bristol Palin, Unwed Teen Mom However, less known is that following in her mother’s footsteps is Bristol Palin, who is launching an online unwed teen mom channel. The channel will will be free to all unwed teen moms who got pregnant before turning 18, had to drop out of school, and have to rely on government assistance as their sole source of income.

“My channel will focus on support groups that will aid unwed teenage mothers,” Bristol Palin said.

“Our groups don’t blame the teenage mother for their pregnancy, we focus the blame on the father, who obviously seduced the teen mom into making poor life choices such as not using protection,” Palin told the Humor Times.

“There’s a stigma these days toward unwed teen moms,” Palin added. “Just 50 years ago it was the norm for a teenage girl to get pregnant, yet our society deems it unacceptable today. Thank God that TV shows like Teen Mom are beginning to tear down that stigma and are showing America the struggle teen moms go through,” Palin said.

As of this writing, there has yet to be a launch date for Bristol Palin’s new channel. However, Palin is in negotiations with SSI, the Women Infants and Children Program (WIC) and other government agencies to help fund the channel.

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Comedian, satirist, comedy writer. Founder of The Heathens of Comedy Tour.

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