[Disclaimer: This article is satire, or what we used to call "fake news" before actual fake news started poisoning the political discourse!]
White House dreams obliterated: Bush endorses Romney
By Matt Rock, PardonThePundit.com
Presumptive GOP nominee Mitt Romney placed a phone call this afternoon to President Barack Obama, congratulating him on a successful presidential campaign in the 2012 elections and wishing him the best of luck in his second term, after former President George W. Bush told an ABC News reporter that he supports Romney.
“Mister President, I just heard the grim news that G.W. has endorsed me,” Romney explained. “You fought a clean and honest, albeit short, campaign. I hope your second term is a bit less controversial and more successful than your first, and from the bottom of the wood-carved hole where my heart would be if I were a human, I congratulate you on your incumbency efforts.”
“Thanks, Mitt. I truly am sorry to hear that Bush endorsed you. I can’t imagine how that must feel,” the President replied. “I know this campaign wasn’t easy for you, with the relentless `he isn’t human’ jokes. Believe me when I tell you that I can relate to your struggles. Is that it then? This whole election is over?”
“I’m saddened that we Republicans never even got to our convention, but everyone knew I won anyway,” Romney responded. “I mean, all that’s left at this point is Ron Paul, and not even Ron Paul takes Ron Paul seriously. So yep, it looks like this is all over. Have a good one!”
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