The long awaited Second Coming of Jesus Christ has been canceled by order of Jesus Himself Coming down incognito to plan for his much-anticipated Second Coming descension to the same world that had rejected him so long ago, He scoped out the scene to ascertain [more...]
Wayne LaPierre, notorious leader of the gun cult religion known as the NRA, is under investigation by the FBI as fitting the profile of the notorious ‘lone gunman’ so prevalent in modern American literature and films. His stoney faced demeanor, extreme viewpoints, non-compromising attitude, arsenal [more...]
Journal entry: January 1, 1998 (age 28) – New Year’s Eve It seemed like such a good idea at the time. Amanda and I wanted to have everyone over to see our first apartment, but didn’t want our guests to feel obligated to bring gifts. (What [more...]
New numbers have come out indicating that in the next year, the states of Washington and Colorado will have the highest number of home sales in the country. What makes these states so successful? The numbers indicate that it may very well be the recent marijuana [more...]
While we wish we could say the economy is just humming along, we can’t so, why not just join our Fiscal Cliff sing along instead? Oh no, Oh no (Hi ho, Hi ho) Oh no, Oh no It’s over the cliff we go No deal [more...]
Trying to be positive about 2012 And so we bid a not-so-fond farewell to the bow of 2012, another large unwieldy year, as it sinks slowly over the horizon, wobbling unsteadily towards the graveyard of memory. And cheers erupt from we folks on shore waving [more...]
Predicting the wackiest events of 2013 Which celebrity will get sued for slugging a paparazzi? Which politician will get caught cheating on his spouse? Whose alcohol-inspired tweet will keep late night talk show joke writers busy? Here is your opportunity to predict the wackiest events [more...]
Governor Jan Brewer and Sheriff Joe Arpaio join forces to deny Santa Claus Arizona Governor Jan Brewer and Sheriff Joe Arpaio of Maricopa County have joined forces this holiday season to make sure that Santa Claus doesn’t invade their state without proper documentation. The move [more...]
The people make their voices heard via ballot measures This being the season of giving, it’s worth looking back at some special gifts from November’s election that received little acknowledgement at the time, ballot measures. These victories came in campaigns that had no candidates — [more...]
Journal entry: December 24, 1994 (age 25) I ripped the Santa-themed Christmas wrapping paper away to reveal a rectangular box with Coca-Cola logos all over it. “Oh,” I thought, “the present must be inside.” But a closer examination revealed that the intended gift was exactly [more...]