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Nov 252014
 
 By , November 25, 2014
Thanksgiving 2014

You got to love Thanksgiving. You do. It’s the law. You got to love Thanksgiving. And be honest, doesn’t a little tryptophan poisoning amongst family and friends sound pretty comforting right about now? What with Ebola infested ISIS members slithering across the border carrying photos [more…]

Nov 172014
 
 By , November 17, 2014
Yet Another Holiday of Guilt

Another guilt-based holiday you may not even know about The autumn dark is lengthening, which harkens the English-speaking, Judeo-Christian Holiday Season is about to split open wider than a crocodile mouth at the bottom of a baby duckling water slide. It begins with Columbus Day. [more…]

Nov 112014
 
 By , November 11, 2014
Obama and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Democrats were forced to avert their eyes or risk anaphylactic shock To call the grotesque drubbing suffered by the Democratic Party in the midterms “monumental” is like referring to the surface of the sun as “warm.” The scene was so grisly, acutely sensitive Democrats (most [more…]

Nov 052014
 
 By , November 5, 2014
The Funny Side of Ebola

Ebola: Diggin deep to find a rich vein of irony Gather round kiddies, because it’s time for Uncle Will to regale you with the funny side of Ebola. Oh, yeah, there is one. Just need a trained professional to find it. Take the widespread fear [more…]

Oct 262014
 
 By , October 26, 2014
The Orange and Black

Time to carve a gourd, it’s Halloween! Here it comes. Creeping down dark alleys. Overturning garbage cans and spooking black cats. The scariest day of the year. With the exception of your next birthday, that is: Halloween. All Hallow’s Eve. The night preceding All Saint’s [more…]

Oct 192014
 
 By , October 19, 2014
Voter ID: One Man, One Vote

Voter IDs — because nobody said democracy was supposed to be convenient Whiners. Bounders. Ingrates. Talking about the incessant griping and sniping currently buzzing over long overdue Republican reforms requiring citizens to produce a government issued voter ID before casting a vote. From the outcry [more…]

Oct 132014
 
 By , October 13, 2014
Scary Masks: Midterm Elections and Halloween

The midterm elections and Halloween are similar: both events highlight tricks and treats Hey everybody. The Midterms Are Coming! Or rather: the midterms are coming. To be most precise; themidtermsarecoming. Because the general response of the vast majority of Americans who aren’t stifling yawns is [more…]

Oct 042014
 
 By , October 4, 2014
Rocktober

‘Rocktober’ and other amiable etymological contractions Welcome to Rocktober, Baby. That’s what all the rock and roll radio stations call this, the 10th month of the year. Doesn’t require more than a casually cocked ear to realize the airwaves are flooded with concerts and giveaways [more…]

Sep 282014
 
 By , September 28, 2014
Daesh Bags

As they behead, rape and pillage, ISIS complains that calling them “Daesh” is disrespectful. Downright exciting to see President Barack Obama give that fierce and steadfast speech in front of the United Nations General Assembly, rallying the world against terrorism. See, GOP. He can be [more…]

Sep 212014
 
 By , September 21, 2014
Where's My Apple iPony?

The new Apple iPhone is like iGoldilocks: There’s a small, a medium and a large. Shake off the blues, put on your shoes, and tell grandma the news: the next generation iPhones are here. Cue the “woo- hoos.” And guess what: they’re huge. Or not. [more…]