Rocker Bruce Springsteen was indicted for sedition by Pam Bondi: “‘The Boss’ ain’t the boss no more!”
On Tuesday, Attorney General Pam Bondi issued an indictment from the Department of Justice charging rocker Bruce Springsteen with sedition. “‘The Boss’ ain’t the boss no more!” she declared flatly, hinting that the DOJ would seek the maximum penalty of 20 years imprisonment in a federal lockup.
Penalties for seditious conspiracy under 18 U.S. Code Section 2384 include fines, imprisonment for up to 20 years or both. Bondi revealed that she would pursue Springsteen under the The Sedition Act of 1918, which penalized individuals for speaking or writing in a disloyal manner, providing support to nations at war with the U.S. and encouraging others to violate the Sedition Act.
Although the act was repealed in 1920 after harsh criticism by First Amendment rights advocates, the AG will proceed as though the law were still in force. Citing the 47th president‘s penchant for picking and choosing the rights he supports, Bondi said that “this one’s a keeper.”
Traditionally, American jurisprudence has found that merely speaking against the government is protected by the First Amendment. Moreover, sedition requires a conspiracy between two or more people. “Not a problem,” snapped Bondi, noting that Springsteen regularly performs before “thousands of co-conspirators at his concerts.”
Uppity left-wing journalists asked Bondi what the difference was between Springsteen’s concerts and the Jan. 6 Capitol Insurrection which occurred four years ago. After pointedly taking down the names of the reporters, Bondi replied that insurrection typically includes a violent uprising of some sort, while sedition involves a conspiracy to engage in an insurrection. In January, Trump issued full pardons to the more than 1,500 insurrectionists convicted or charged with crimes stemming from the Jan. 6 “tourist event.”
“What Springsteen did was much more serious,” said Bondi. “He was rude, he was impolite; he was disloyal!” On May 14, Springsteen and his E Street Band performed in Manchester, U.K. as part of the Land of Hope and Dreams Tour. Trump has said that the tour is part of an effort by Springsteen to “stir up the little people, the ignorant and the hobos, to strike out against America and the Trump family.”
Bondi took up Springsteen’s songs in turn, quoting his tune, The River: “Though I know the river is dry…”
“This,” hissed Bondi angrily, “was done in the face of Jewish-started wildfires which devastated the west coast. Worse, is the title of the tune No Surrender, which Springsteen blatantly ripped off from President Trump’s similarly-named, wildly successful high-top sneakers, which by the way are very popular among African Americans. Kanye West loves them.”
“Springsteen’s Thunder Road,” went on Bondi venomously, “romanticizes ‘fuel-injected’ automobiles and works against the electric car industry as represented by DOGE baron Elon Musk. Then there Springsteen’s lyrics from I’m on Fire, and I quote:
Sometimes it’s like someone took a knife, baby
Edgy and dull and cut a six inch valley
Through the middle of my skull…
“This is to even the simplest child an obvious suggestion to assassinate the president,” said the Attorney General.
Springsteen, presently being held at Guantanamo, and denied access to a lawyer, was unavailable for comment.
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