Airline Pilot, Responsible for Thousands of Lives, to Vote Trump in November

Airline Pilot, Responsible for Thousands of Lives, to Vote Trump in November
J Crock is a veteran newsman with over 50 years experience who doesn't understand why his serious attempts at reporting the news keep winding up on the comedy section of this publication. He spends his days imploring the editors to cease making a mockery of his craft, his nights filled with rage and one day very soon, he will have his revenge. Oh, yes… he'll have his revenge.
J Crock

“He’s the only man who can lead this country forward,” says airline pilot with a straight face. BALTIMORE — According to multiple reports out today, Cpt. Fred Staples, … Read more

Trump on Fox: Tax Returns ‘Creatively Fraudulent,’ Shouldn’t Have to Publish

Trump on Fox: Tax Returns ‘Creatively Fraudulent,’ Shouldn’t Have to Publish
Michael was born in South Africa at the height of the apartheid era He quickly became involved in the underground resistance movement, knew Nelson Mandela and other prominent revolutionaries, some of whom later moved into privileged positions formerly occupied by whites. After several exciting escapes, he was forced to flee the country in disguise. He successfully made his way to the UK and gained his PhD at Cambridge on a university scholarship, He then pursued the dualcareer of college professor and social revolutionary, provoking academic and political mayhemwherever he went. Having thus failed miserably at both politics and education, he now cynically rails like Diogenes at the foibles of mankind in bitter satires and faintly subtly edgy political cartoons. History will, however absolve him. In 2006 he discovered a new Shakespeare play, but it's going to take a new generation to acknowledge it. Check out his website, Editorial and Political Cartoons.
Michael Egan

‘This is exactly the kind of hypocritical dishonesty we want from an American president!’ said Sean Hannity during an interview with Trump on his tax returns. NYC – … Read more

For 18th Time Today, Hillary Clinton Asks Aide if Bernie Has Conceded Yet

For 18th Time Today, Hillary Clinton Asks Aide if Bernie Has Conceded Yet
Alexander Vosh has lived in Rhode Island for all of his life, but is often asked where he grew up by other Rhode Islanders due to his lack of the state's R-optional accent - which will make an appearance on occasion, usually when Vosh is annoyed. Vosh is also highly allergic to right-wing politics, and thinks whisky is swell. He writes regularly for The Nil Admirari, where this story first appeared.
Alexander Vosh

“It’s my turn. Everyone knows it’s my turn, except him.” – Clinton WASHINGTON — A campaign aide confirmed reports Hillary Clinton had asked her for the eighteenth time … Read more

Trump Makes His Pick: Silvio Berlusconi for Vice-President

Trump Makes His Pick: Silvio Berlusconi for Vice-President
Social media
The Humor Times founder/publisher/editor/writer may wear a lot of hats, but he likes it that way. Still, his favorite job is writing fake news articles. He is also a musician and songwriter, who plays guitar, mandolin and harmonica, with several CDs to his credit.
James Israel
Social media

‘He’s the King of Vice, after all,’ says Trump Donald Trump, the presumptive Republican nominee for president, shocked the party establishment and ended months of speculation by picking … Read more

Devil Announces ‘New Faustian Bargain’ with Republican Party

Devil Announces ‘New Faustian Bargain’ with Republican Party
Michael was born in South Africa at the height of the apartheid era He quickly became involved in the underground resistance movement, knew Nelson Mandela and other prominent revolutionaries, some of whom later moved into privileged positions formerly occupied by whites. After several exciting escapes, he was forced to flee the country in disguise. He successfully made his way to the UK and gained his PhD at Cambridge on a university scholarship, He then pursued the dualcareer of college professor and social revolutionary, provoking academic and political mayhemwherever he went. Having thus failed miserably at both politics and education, he now cynically rails like Diogenes at the foibles of mankind in bitter satires and faintly subtly edgy political cartoons. History will, however absolve him. In 2006 he discovered a new Shakespeare play, but it's going to take a new generation to acknowledge it. Check out his website, Editorial and Political Cartoons.
Michael Egan

‘The GOP will win in 2016 but lose its political soul for all Eternity,’ the Evil One predicted, shortly after striking a new Faustian bargain with Republican leadership. … Read more

CDC Breakthrough: ‘Butt Bump’ May Prevent Colds and Flu

CDC Breakthrough: ‘Butt Bump’ May Prevent Colds and Flu
Diane de Anda is a third generation Latina and retired UCLA professor. Tired of cranking out technical articles in a "publish or perish" atmosphere, she now spends most of her time writing adult fiction, children's books, parody, and satire.Her weapon of choice is the limerick, aimed with humor and a touch of malice at society's icons, celebrities, politicians, and other irritating folk.
Diane de Anda

The butt bump may just be the safest greeting of all New research findings just released from the CDC show that the “butt bump” may be the safest … Read more

Lucifer, in the Flesh, Welcomes Comparison to Cruz

Lucifer, in the Flesh, Welcomes Comparison to Cruz
Michael was born in South Africa at the height of the apartheid era He quickly became involved in the underground resistance movement, knew Nelson Mandela and other prominent revolutionaries, some of whom later moved into privileged positions formerly occupied by whites. After several exciting escapes, he was forced to flee the country in disguise. He successfully made his way to the UK and gained his PhD at Cambridge on a university scholarship, He then pursued the dualcareer of college professor and social revolutionary, provoking academic and political mayhemwherever he went. Having thus failed miserably at both politics and education, he now cynically rails like Diogenes at the foibles of mankind in bitter satires and faintly subtly edgy political cartoons. History will, however absolve him. In 2006 he discovered a new Shakespeare play, but it's going to take a new generation to acknowledge it. Check out his website, Editorial and Political Cartoons.
Michael Egan

Satanic Council defiantly embraces Ted Cruz: ‘The miserable son of a bitch is a natural for us!’ says Lucifer. HADES – The Satanic Council today “totally rejected” claims … Read more

Trump Wins Big with Americans Regretting Not Growing Up in 1930s Germany

Trump Wins Big with Americans Regretting Not Growing Up in 1930s Germany
Alexander Vosh has lived in Rhode Island for all of his life, but is often asked where he grew up by other Rhode Islanders due to his lack of the state's R-optional accent - which will make an appearance on occasion, usually when Vosh is annoyed. Vosh is also highly allergic to right-wing politics, and thinks whisky is swell. He writes regularly for The Nil Admirari, where this story first appeared.
Alexander Vosh

Donald Trump pledges to blame socialists and Democrats when the Capitol Building is burned down shortly after he becomes president. WASHINGTON — Today, Republican presidential candidate and fascism-friendly … Read more

Billionaire Sheldon Adelson Buys The Onion

Billionaire Sheldon Adelson Buys The Onion
Michael was born in South Africa at the height of the apartheid era He quickly became involved in the underground resistance movement, knew Nelson Mandela and other prominent revolutionaries, some of whom later moved into privileged positions formerly occupied by whites. After several exciting escapes, he was forced to flee the country in disguise. He successfully made his way to the UK and gained his PhD at Cambridge on a university scholarship, He then pursued the dualcareer of college professor and social revolutionary, provoking academic and political mayhemwherever he went. Having thus failed miserably at both politics and education, he now cynically rails like Diogenes at the foibles of mankind in bitter satires and faintly subtly edgy political cartoons. History will, however absolve him. In 2006 he discovered a new Shakespeare play, but it's going to take a new generation to acknowledge it. Check out his website, Editorial and Political Cartoons.
Michael Egan

The big-bucks GOP donor and casino mogul cited Sunday’s Boston Globe anti-Trump front page as the main motivator to purchase The Onion. LAS VEGAS – Casino billionaire Sheldon … Read more

BREAKING: Koch Brothers Running for President

BREAKING: Koch Brothers Running for President
Diane de Anda is a third generation Latina and retired UCLA professor. Tired of cranking out technical articles in a "publish or perish" atmosphere, she now spends most of her time writing adult fiction, children's books, parody, and satire.Her weapon of choice is the limerick, aimed with humor and a touch of malice at society's icons, celebrities, politicians, and other irritating folk.
Diane de Anda

The Koch brothers have decided that they will have to be the Republican presidential candidates themselves. An anonymous source has informed this reporter that the Koch brothers are … Read more

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