golfing with Elise Stephanik

Elise Stephanik

Young GOP upstart from New York’s 21st District, graduated from Harvard, Elise now fully understands – she never had to be any smarter than Marjorie Taylor Green to climb to the top of “this” Republican dung heap.

Rubbing elbows with Devin Nunes and Mitch McConnell didn’t take brains, just a willingness to stab people in the back.

All that time at Harvard- enduring frat party crap- what a waste of time.

My parents own a Lumber company, after high school they could have dropped me off at Congress … If I kicked the chair out from under Liz Cheney- victory would have been MINE… years ago.

Fake the polite, bid my time, then- WHAMMO. Bury a battle axe and smile for the camera.
Send flowers, La-t-Da- and off we go- to Mar-A-Lago!

All I do is- kneel before Emperor Donald- tell him he is Hollywood handsome-STILL President- (pro level golfer) … the world is flat- Easy sleasy.

As a MAGA bonus I’m including- renouncing Truth, Justice, the American Way, Christian faith and some corny Oath to a Constitutional thingy.


GOP Wieners like me- use Trump’s GOLFING playbook, LIE, CHEAT (and) STEAL, then suddenly everyone wants to wash your balls!

One less thing to worry about- I don’t even play golf!

You say Tomato and I say-it wasn’t an insurrection, you say PO-ta-To- I say put those losers on hold, I’m… sharpen my nails, practicing my swing, ready for the next clubbing.

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Signed: Glenn Jones