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[Disclaimer: This article is satire, or what we used to call "fake news" before actual fake news started poisoning the political discourse!]

Bush Authorizes Renewed Air Strikes in Iraq

Aug 092014
 By , August 9, 2014

Order for renewed air strikes in Iraq comes from the top

President Bush, in the face of bi-partisan opposition, has again authorized the use of air strikes in Iraq, entrenching the U.S. even further into a political and military quagmire that has spanned multiple administrations.

Renewed air strikes in IraqAfter deploying more troops last month to aid the Iraqi government, insurgents — apparently unaware of America’s expressed wishes to not get drawn into further conflict — have begun to fire all willy nilly at anyone and everyone in the other direction.

This, of course, has put U.S. troops in real danger and has thus necessitated the use of greater firepower.

Iraqi Prime Minister Maliki has confirmed the danger and issued a formal request for the American government to push back the Sunni insurgency and keep them from overtaking key positions, such as oil refineries.

And though the president has made promises to the American public to draw back and, eventually, remove American forces from the region entirely, the president has once again agreed to more military support and air strikes.

A few brave voices on the hill have offered their concerns and raised reasonable questions such as, “How long will this war go on?” and “How long has Bush been in power now?”

Much to the chagrin of regular journalists everywhere, the conservative right-wing media, for some reason, has yet to fully cover the story or challenge the president on his decision.


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Jeff Boldt is an English teacher living in China and the writer and editor of Iron E-News, a website dedicated to that ever-abiding alternate bizarro world -- at times all too closely mirroring our own.

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