"World's Funniest News Source"
Making fun of the headlines today, so you donāt have to The news doesnāt need to be complicated and confusing; thatās what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, as in the case with anything … Read moreRipping the Headlines Today, 6/18/18
Trump proposes ways to increase his bargaining power ahead of the next summit with Kim Jong-un. A White House informant has just leaked information regarding a secret meeting President Trump had this morning regarding the … Read moreTrump Calls Secret Meeting to Power-up for Next Summit
New, mandatory Pledge of Allegiance ghost-written by Kellyanne Conway. Commandant Trump, expanding his power over we serf’s everyday life in keeping with his expanding ego, has taken it upon himself to rewrite the Pledge of … Read moreTrump Initiates His Own Version of the Pledge of Allegiance
The president likes to talk late at night with the Fox News host: is he saying his prayers with Hannity? “GOODNIGHT DONNY.” “GOODNIGHT SEANY.” New York Magazine tells us that our President & Fox News … Read moreSleepless in the White House: Saying Prayers with Hannity
Rift between Donald and Melania caused by strange affair After more than a year of speculation that President Trump and First Lady Melania Trump have not been sharing a bed, the likely reason for that … Read moreTrump White House Affair Exposed
Insider sources reveal negotiations behind the release of three Americans Unnamed insider sources revealed today that as part of the original negotiations, the Trump Administration had planned to send Rudy Giuliani, Michael Cohen and Jeff … Read moreNorth Korean Release of Three Americans Explained
Sources say Kim Jung-un to require secret conditions be met before historic meeting. Informed sources reveal that North Korea’s Kim Jung-un will require that several secret conditions be met before his historic meeting with President … Read moreKim Jung-un’s Secret Conditions
Trump handshake must be in top form for important meeting of heads of state. Fearing that he could be outdone by Kim Jung-un when they meet in a few weeks, the president has been furiously … Read morePresident Practicing Patented Trump Handshake for Kim Jung-un
Microsoft is monitoring X-Box gamers for cursing, and they don’t like it. The recent decision to helicopter X-Box users for cursing while Microsoft merrily trawl their data has resulted in a serious backlash. X-Box gamers … Read moreMilitant X-Box Gamers Denounce Censors as āSad, Pathetic Losers with a Lot of Time on Their Handsā
Late-night Twitter habit is all about sexual frustration, says Dr Hyman Schadenfreud, new White House psychiatrist. WASHINGTON DC ā President Donald Trumpās increasingly bizarre behavior, including his unhinged twitter habit, is the product of extreme and … Read moreTrump Twitter Habit is ‘Sexual Sublimation,’ Says Psychiatrist