Ripping the Headlines Today, 12/8/20

Ripping the Headlines Today, 12/8/20
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is … Read more

Trump Reportedly ‘Inspecting Bunker’ after Iranian Murder Warrant Issued

Trump Reportedly ‘Inspecting Bunker’ after Iranian Murder Warrant Issued
Ted holland attended college for four years. The year that he bothered to go to class he studied history. He majored in throwing quarters in the jukebox in the Student Union canteen and minored in a girl named Marsha. His books include This Day In African American Musicand B Western Actors Encyclopedia.
Ted Holland

The feared Slobovian Secret Service is set to execute a recently-issued Iranian murder warrant. Part of the continuing series, Dispatches from SNN (Slobovian News Network). Iranian government officials … Read more

President Reveals Trump Tower Project in Tehran

President Reveals Trump Tower Project in Tehran
A writer by trade and a wisecracker by necessity, Evan relies on a well-timed joke to get him out of awkward situations, traffic tickets, and the occasional hostage crisis.

Trump Tower project in Iran on track despite tensions, says press secretary. During a private luncheon with representatives from the Republican National Committee, President Trump announced that plans … Read more

This is Your Brain on Aphorisms: Iran Towards War for a Diversion

This is Your Brain on Aphorisms: Iran Towards War for a Diversion
I was born a young baby. Then I grew up. Then I grew confused. Then I grew tired. I'm a 20th century man who's somehow been transported to the 21st century, with one foot in the gone past and the other in the here now. I started my blog mymanymoodsofme toward the end of 2012. There I write humorous essays, stories and poems (lyrics from my songs), in addition to my aphorisms. It's good work... if you get it. In my spare time I play chess, write songs, and reflect upon what I see. I'm very happy to be colluding with Humor Times, and hope you enjoy the result. Cheers!

Seeking a diversion from impeachment headlines, Trump puts US in peril yet again! Tax cuts for the rich followed by acts of war give me an uneasy feeling … Read more

Ripping the Headlines Today, 10/28/19

Ripping the Headlines Today, 10/28/19
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is … Read more

This is Your Brain on Aphorisms: Ukrainegate, Last Con-Temptation of Trump?

This is Your Brain on Aphorisms: Ukrainegate, Last Con-Temptation of Trump?
I was born a young baby. Then I grew up. Then I grew confused. Then I grew tired. I'm a 20th century man who's somehow been transported to the 21st century, with one foot in the gone past and the other in the here now. I started my blog mymanymoodsofme toward the end of 2012. There I write humorous essays, stories and poems (lyrics from my songs), in addition to my aphorisms. It's good work... if you get it. In my spare time I play chess, write songs, and reflect upon what I see. I'm very happy to be colluding with Humor Times, and hope you enjoy the result. Cheers!

Ukrainegate explained in aphorisms. WikiLeaks… and so does the White House! Idiots and morons always do cover-oops. What do I think the White House should do about all … Read more

Are These Poems Strange? People Call Them ‘Haikus’ – What? Oh, Gesundheit!

Are These Poems Strange? People Call Them ‘Haikus’ – What? Oh, Gesundheit!
rfreed has a fertile, if somewhat warped, imagination. Read him at your own risk! More laugh gaffes available at Semi-Humorous Humor
!!!!!Buy 'The Alaska Papers' from lulu.com. Only $10 !!!!! An almost funny publication!

They call them ‘Haikus’ – we call ’em good! Obama make peace, progress with Cuba, Iran. Now will Hulk Trump smash. Immigrants sneak in, quickly come over border. … Read more

Iran’s Trump Cartoon Contest

Iran’s Trump Cartoon Contest
rfreed has a fertile, if somewhat warped, imagination. Read him at your own risk! More laugh gaffes available at Semi-Humorous Humor
!!!!!Buy 'The Alaska Papers' from lulu.com. Only $10 !!!!! An almost funny publication!

I thought these people weren’t supposed to have a sense of humor! Introducing Iran‘s Trump Cartoon Contest. According to the Tehran Times over 1,600 entries were sent to … Read more

Trump’s Bone-Spurs ‘Miraculously Disappear’ After Faith Healer’s ‘Laying-on-of- Hands’ Exorcism

Trump’s Bone-Spurs ‘Miraculously Disappear’ After Faith Healer’s ‘Laying-on-of- Hands’ Exorcism
Michael was born in South Africa at the height of the apartheid era He quickly became involved in the underground resistance movement, knew Nelson Mandela and other prominent revolutionaries, some of whom later moved into privileged positions formerly occupied by whites. After several exciting escapes, he was forced to flee the country in disguise. He successfully made his way to the UK and gained his PhD at Cambridge on a university scholarship, He then pursued the dualcareer of college professor and social revolutionary, provoking academic and political mayhemwherever he went. Having thus failed miserably at both politics and education, he now cynically rails like Diogenes at the foibles of mankind in bitter satires and faintly subtly edgy political cartoons. History will, however absolve him. In 2006 he discovered a new Shakespeare play, but it's going to take a new generation to acknowledge it. Check out his website, Editorial and Political Cartoons.

Stunned podiatrists declare president’s feet to be entirely bone-spur free after ‘Toe Jam’ religious invocation.  WASHINGTON DC – President’s Trump’s heels have been declared to be “entirely bone-spur … Read more

How Much We Do Forget: Our Fights with Cuba, Iran and Socialism and How We Caused Them

How Much We Do Forget: Our Fights with Cuba, Iran and Socialism and How We Caused Them
rfreed has a fertile, if somewhat warped, imagination. Read him at your own risk! More laugh gaffes available at Semi-Humorous Humor
!!!!!Buy 'The Alaska Papers' from lulu.com. Only $10 !!!!! An almost funny publication!

My, My! How much we do forget! Obama tried to connect with our old foes Cuba and Iran to smooth out the decades old conflicts and make the … Read more

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