TUCKER IS A GREEN M&M F**KER

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“TUCKER IS A GREEN M&M F**KER”

For purposes of full disclosure, I must say
Triggering snowflakes is my poetic forte.
If this is the first poem of mine you’ve read,
Some antediluvian types may end up dead.
My words are like irresistible, raw red meat
That all the right-wingers are forced to eat!
Like Fox “News” fascist fool Tucker Carlson
Who on TV made it clear he loves M&M’s.
And by “love” I mean Tucker wants to hump
All of the green M&M’s, and so does Trump!
The real reason Melania won’t hold his hand
Is because of all of the green M&M stains.
“It melts in your mouth, not in your hands”
Is M&M’s clearly sexual long-time slogan.
But of course we all know that’s not true,
They’ll melt in both if you know what to do!
So the rich bow-tie boy Tucker is outraged
The green M&M no longer has sexy legs,
Because her go-go boots were removed
And replaced with some sensible shoes.
Get a life, you racist Trumptarded pervert!
And stop fondling your chocolate dessert!

Jake Pickering
Arcata, CA, USA

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Signed: Jake Pickering