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Mohamed Himself Introduces Slain ISIS Fighters To Their Much Deserved Reward

Jul 292016
 
 By , July 29, 2016

ISIS ‘heroes’ find their heavenly reward

The dead ISIS members paraded up the path leading to their Glory. As they walked they boasted about their accomplishments.

ISIS fighters in heaven

“I drove a truck with bombs in it into a marketplace and killed 22 people!” spoke one, his broken teeth smiling in self-satisfaction.

“I wore a suicide vest into a hospital of the enemy and further maimed another 12 people!” said another as he limped his way to his heavenly reward.

“I shot at least 16 villagers before I met my fate!” laughed another, drops of his own blood mingling on his torn clothes with those of his victims.

“Now we get our reward for being the only true disciples of Islam!” All laughed and cheered in agreement.

They approached the gate where a wizened old man stood. “Welcome my brothers!” he stated as he opened the door for them. “You have made it to your true home for eternity!” He held it wide and bowed. The men all cheered and chanted “Allahu Akbar” over and over as they entered throwing their arms up in the air joyously.

The old man stepped before them and bowed again. “You have the honor of knowing that a great personage will introduce you to your rewards for your great devotion. Mohamed, the great Prophet himself, will greet you!”

A stunned silence enveloped the men, then suddenly they all erupted into spontaneous cheer. “Hurrah! Hurrah!”

From out of a blaze of light stepped the One they knew as The Prophet. He was exactly as they had imaged him; an older man, reposed, wearing the robes and headpiece as they had always imagined him to be.

The Prophet held his arms out wide. “Welcome, my faithful followers! You have come to the place for your just reward for serving me! Now you shall have it!”

The men all bowed down their faces alight with love and respect for their Leader. “Allah is great! Allah is great!” they yelled in their various accents. They groveled on their knees before their Holy Man.

Mohamed beamed in great pleasure at their admiration. “Come now brothers! Let me take you to your reward!”

He led them to a gate a hundred feet high with a wall even higher extending into infinity on either side. “Here is where you will spend Eternity!” He threw the doors wide open.

The devoted ones all rushed inside. They then stopped in shock at what they saw therein.

Absolute chaos reigned. Shots rang out. Bombs exploded. Severed limbs flew through the air. Screams and yelling pierced the ears. Everywhere people ran in panic. Buildings burned or were half in rubble.

The bewildered men stood for a moment surveying the madness before them.. Then they turned to their Leader in confusion.

The same smile was upon the Prophet’s lips as before, but this time with a slight, sinister twist to them. “Yes, gentlemen, this is your reward for having served me so well. That is because you don’t know the real me.” The aged man waved his hand before his face and it changed, the flesh altering, growing leaner, engorging itself until it was a flaming red color. The ears became pointed, the lines of his profile becoming more evil, more cunning. His entire figure became bent, more massive, muscular.

“Now you see me as I really am. Did you not know that Satan is the Master of illusion? You should have! What fools you are! No spiritual or religious Master would ever ask you to perpetrate the atrocities you have done! But one disguised as a moral leader might!” He laughed fully, evilly. “Yes, my friends, you have served me well. But, alas, I am not Mohamed! I am merely the poor, humble Devil, but I must say that you executed my will splendidly. You have brought mayhem and strife to the world, the elements that nurture my Being, my Soul, and I thank you greatly for it.”

“Now, since you found your earthly heaven in destruction and violence, you can now enjoy those fruits of your labor for the all time. Enjoy, gentlemen, enjoy!”

With that he banged the gates shut and locked them from behind. The agony and the shock in the martyrs crying voices echoed out from the Hell they had themselves created. Satan laughed loud and deep, before turning to take care of other, more pressing business.

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Roger Freed has a fertile, if somewhat warped, imagination. Read him at your own risk! More laugh gaffes available at Semi-Humorous Humor. For something in a more serious mode get "The Book Of Songs" by Roger Freed from Lulu.com. A collection of short stories illustrating the subtle and powerful influence music can have on our minds and our spirits.
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