CAC banner ad
Humor Times subscribe

[Disclaimer: This article is a "fake news" piece. Proceed at your own risk!]

Secret to Mayan Calendar Revealed

Nov 212012
 By , November 21, 2012

The Mayan Calendar: Predicting the end of the world as we know it?

We are now just about a month away from the end of the world, and how do we know this? Because we have a Mayan calendar that predicts it. At least, that is what a large portion of humans around the world believe.

Mayan calendar

Incomplete Mayan calendar changes end times prophecy.

According to various readings of the ancient Mayan calendar, the earth will undergo catastrophic changes on December 21, 2012. Either that or the changes will be for the better. It’s all according to whom you ask.

However, one scientist says both sides are wrong. While the calendar does appear to end on 12/21/12, in reality, there is a perfectly logical reason for that.

“The person who kept the Mayan calendar going way back when died,” said historian Greta Shushkind, “and when the next person took over the task, he wasn’t as, shall we say, ‘married to his job’ as the first Mayan timekeeper. Within a week or two of taking the job, the replacement timekeeper decided to walk away, leaving the calendar to fizzle out on December 12, 2012.”

Shushkind says by the time anyone noticed the missing astronomer, too many celestial events had passed unrecorded. For that reason, she believes the gloomy date is nothing more than a result of shoddy record keeping.

“Odds are pretty good that on December 22, there will still be last-minute shoppers clogging the malls, making parking a nightmare and having quite a few people wishing for an end to the madness, but end of the world as we know it? Hardly.”

The following two tabs change content below.
P. Beckert's is one voice vying for frequency room at the top of the opinion dial. Angered and bewildered by many of today’s events, P. Beckert uses humor as a tool to fight an onslaught of stupidity and ignorance that seems to permeate the airwaves and pollute the sensitivities of a once-brilliant nation. If you like her posts, become a follower and leave a comment. And don't forget to share on Facebook, Twitter and other social accounts! Syndicated from her I Said Laugh, Dammit blog.

Like this content? Leave a comment below! Get notified of new content on Subscribe via email!