A Scene from ‘Amadeus Goes to Washington’

A young Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart submits a draft agenda for the President’s consideration.

Hoping to pursue a career in politics, the young Mozart , who at times refers to himself as Amadeus, obtains an internship as a junior political strategist for President Trump. He has just submitted a draft agenda for the President’s consideration.

TRUMP: Well, Mr. Mozart! A good effort. Decidedly that. An excellent effort! You’ve shown us something quite new today.

[Mozart bows frantically: he is over-excited.]

MOZART: It is new, it is, isn’t it, Sire?

TRUMP: Yes, indeed.

MOZART: So then you like it? You really like it, Your Majesty?

TRUMP: Of course I do. It’s very good. Of course now and then — just now and then — it gets a touch elaborate.

MOZART: What do you mean, Sire?

TRUMP: Well, I mean occasionally it seems to have, how shall one say? [he stops in difficulty; turning to his right:] How shall one say, Vice-Chancellor?

VANCE: Too many regulations, Your Majesty.

TRUMP: Exactly. Very well put. Too many regulations.

MOZART: I don’t understand. Regulations are protections for our society.  There are just as many regulations, Majesty, as are required for the protection of our citizens. Neither more nor less.

TRUMP:  My dear fellow, there are in fact only so many protections a country can manage at any one time. I think I’m right in saying that, aren’t I, Court Counsellor?

MUSK: Yes! yes! er, on the whole, yes, Majesty.

MOZART: But this is absurd!

TRUMP: My dear, young man, don’t take it too hard. Your work is ingenious. It’s quality work. There are simply too many protections, that’s all. Cut two protections for every new one and it will be perfect.

MOZART: Which two did you have in mind to cut first, Majesty?

TRUMP: (turns to advisers quizzically)

RFK Jr.:  Vaccines, Your Majesty.  They’re a woke radical communist plot to warp young bodies.

McMAHON:  Music education, Your Majesty.  it’s a woke radical communist plot to warp young minds.

TRUMP: Well. There it is.

MOZART:  AAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHHH!!!

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Michael Perlman

Michael Perlman sprouted in the shadow of Wrigley Field, home of the Chicago Cubs and, at that time, the Chicago Bears. He found his calling in mathematics at Caltech, Stanford, Cambridge UK, the University of Chicago, and finally the University of Washington in Seattle, where he was the founding chair of the Department of Statistical Science.But the mathematical lobe in his brain was drawn to the rhythm and meter of rhyming verse, giving voice to "Baldy Bear" and other whimsical characters.Michael has complemented his mathematical endeavors with both poetry and prose, often satirical and/or political, hopefully amusing.

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