[Disclaimer: This is a satirical news piece, just for fun, read at your own risk!]

Miami Heat Streak Ends — PBS Renews Telethon to Raise Awareness for Regular Season

NBA “owes survival” to PBS campaign, says Miami Heat coach

Without realizing it, for the past month or so, the world was interested in the NBA’s regular season games.  And all of the credit goes to one team: The Miami Heat.

miami heatIn case you just came out of a coma, live in Antarctica, lost your short-term memory, or just came out of a coma, basketball’s reigning champions recently made history by winning 27 games in succession.

The only team to have done better were the “Yankees of Basketball” (or the LA Lakers), and their record still stands at an impressive 33, which, as every true basketball fan knows, is the smallest odd repeating digit that is not a prime number.

But, unfortunately, since the Miami Heat were not able to continue their complete basketball dominance all the way up to what’s known as The Finals, the fickle world has again lost interest.

For this reason, PBS has renewed their annual basketball telethon dedicated to quashing global ignorance of, and indifference towards, the sport’s regular season games.

And for all those faithful viewers out there, Leonard Nimoy (pronounced “Lehnerd Neemoy”) will, logically, pick up where he left off.

“Spock may not exist,” reported the emotionless Vulcan, “but the NBA regular season does.  And if you’re watching right now (probably with your hand pressed against the glass in the shape of the Vulcan salute), put The Wrath of Khan on hold and tune in to ESPN to see the Hornets take on the Magic.”

Well basketball fanatics, it seems the future coexistence of humans and Klingons isn’t the only “undiscovered country” out there.

Jeff Boldt
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