[Disclaimer: This is a satirical news piece, just for fun, read at your own risk!]

Coming to a Theater Near You: The EXTENDABLES! Four Ex-Presidents Fight to Get Their Turf Back!

Four ex-Presidents. Four hearts still filled with a passion for the game.

Together the four ex-Presidents form a super team…


The tale of first class Presidents now turned into first class fighting machines.

ex-presidentsAble to rip old legislation apart with their bare hands! Able to create new laws in the blink of an eye.

Jimmy ‘Running Man’ Carter – the man with the knack for making peace deals. Also one hell of a peanut farmer.

George ‘the First’ Bush – a man of the Corporations, for the Corporations and by the Corporations. Able to parachute into any corporate office for any price.

Bill ‘Paws’ Clinton – the smooth talking man from Arkansas. Able to schmoozle and bedazzle anyone, be it heads of Arabic States, European diplomats or floozies from the farm, he can bid them and bed them.

George ‘Junior’ Bush – able and willing to start a war any time, any place with anyone for any reason. He put the ‘chicken’ in the term ‘chicken hawk.’

Together these ex-Presidents embark on an incredible mission: To get a new law enacted ENABLING THEM TO SEEK A THIRD TERM IN OFFICE!

Their nemesis – the Congress and Senate of the United States of America – two backwards organizations that evilly seek to send old statesmen out to pasture and to corruptly not allow them their democratic rights of seeking another chance at more power and prestige.

Four ex-Presidents out to return to their old life of glory and fame. Facing an uphill battle against a well entrenched enemy, they have to fight against strong odds and their own need to use the toilet every half hour.

Special guest performance by Arnold Schwarzenegger, as the muscles and might behind their operation. Little do they know, however, that he has his own agenda to be the King of the Hill himself!

Hold your breath as the five of them battle it out between themselves in a fight for the throne!

Coming soon to a theater near you.

The Extendables Action Figures are available at your local toy store!

IN THE MAKING – The Extendables II

The Fab Four are again called out from retirement to fight against an evil alliance between Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann, who use their feminine wiles to try to take the countries top seat using catty tactics. The men must, by any and all means, prevent a woman from ever sitting in the President’s chair!

Roger Freed