[Disclaimer: This is a satirical news piece, just for fun, read at your own risk!]

Eric Holder in New Summer Blockbuster: DOJBall!

A performance by Eric Holder and his all-star cast that America won’t soon forget

In theaters now! If you liked Ben Stiller and Vince Vaughn’s performance in the original 2004 sports comedy, “Dodgeball,” then you are going to love Iron E-Media’s latest release: “DOJBall,” starring Attorney General Eric Holder.

Eric Holder in New Summer Blockbuster: DOJBall!
(Photoshop work by Janai Wallace.)

With such memorable lines as, “No one makes me police my own policy!” and “If you can dodge justice, you can dodge a ball,” this summer movie is sure to be a classic.

“DOJBall is a hit!” raves New York Times reporter David Sanger.  “You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, and, more importantly, you’ll want to get out there and dodge some justice!”

With stellar supporting performances by president Obama and Jay Carney, this film has all the magic of past movies such as “Watergate” and “Contragate”, but hasn’t received near the media hype and attention that it deserves.

Nevertheless, ticket sales are up and early indicators show that  this cast won’t be dodging stardom anytime soon.

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Jeff Boldt
Jeff Boldt is an English teacher living in China and the writer and editor of Iron E-News, a website dedicated to that ever-abiding alternate bizarro world -- at times all too closely mirroring our own.