Take a Gander at this Lame Duck

Poor Trump doesn’t know he’s a lame duck yet

lame duck Trump

Well, duh — it’s Donald’s final year, isn’t it?

lame duck Trump

Of course, President Trump doesn’t know it yet — he’s too busy calling our intelligence mavens ‘do-do heads,’ counting everyone else’ spareribs and complaining “What kind of country runs out of Duck Sauce?”

And, come-on — lame duck Trump is really thin-skinned — even Kim Jong Un ruffled his tail feathers calling him old!

I’m sure anything Trump calls Kim back will keep him from lighting the fuse on his 2 Missiles — ‘Fatty’ & ‘Shorty’!

What are we in 3rd Grade?

But, the world wonders how a man Trump’s age can keep up such a rigorous Asian trip without sleep… Duplication!

That’s right — he found “What the Duck” decoy from Spencer’s Gifts to pick up the slack!

Who do you think would wear those silk pajamas?

Take a second look sometime: beautifully hand-carved wood in Trump’s likeness & Melania doesn’t even complain when there’s a mix-up, either!

Okay, there is the splinters; but it doesn’t say, “Get off my hair”!

And, those Trump-Putin whisperings at the Summit?  That wasn’t about collusion — Putin wants his daughter’s money back from Trump U!

Oh sure, Trump insists he asked Putin three times about the Election Quackery interference — but each time he demanded Disneyland tickets to meet Huey, Dewey & Louie!

Yes, it’s time he put his ducks in a row! On the President’s return, I hope he appreciates the White House Chef welcoming him home with ‘Trump L’Orange’ instead of an All-American Turkey… because everyone knows he secretly wants to save up all his ‘Pardons’!

And, if Trump’s lucky; nobody will make him open another frigin’ Fortune Cookie to read aloud — because I heard Confucius just printed a zillion new ones: “Mueller say, you’re fired!”

Well, the infamous Russian dossier is now making sense to me & I can sleep at night! 

But, you have to read the small print: in 2013,  when his bodyguard was offered a female for Trump’s pleasure — he said, “Hey, if it walks like a duck & wears a Babushka… send her up!”

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Marilyn Sands

Marilyn Sands

Marilyn Sands is a former 80's Stand-Up Comic who started out in the DC/MD/VA area, moved to the Bay Area in Northern California and now resides in L.A. She has sold jokes to Joan Rivers, lesser lights and gag magazines, and is a screenwriter, playwright and author of non-fiction.
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