Hello folks. How are things going for you?
Thatâs good.
At the moment I am hold up in an abandoned farmhouse in the Midwest.
I have it boarded up and sealed off as much as possible.
I donât do this normally. Itâs just that present conditions demand it.
(Crashing sounds coming from background) âAaaaaarrrrhhhh! !!!!! Grrrr!!!!â
Excuse me a moment please. âDIE, CREATURE FROM HELL!!!!!! EAT THIS TIRE WRENCH!!!!!!!â
(Crunch! Smash! Hurt!)
Ok, Iâm back now.
The radio and television are out.
Iâm just glad the Internet is still going. At least there is some connection with the outside world.
At least it seems like there is some outside world.
(More crashing sounds) âErrrrrrr!!!!!! Graaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!!!â
Iâll be right back. âGET OUT YOU SATANâS SPAWN!!!!! TASTE MY SHOTGUN PELLETS, YOU BLANK-EYED FREAK!!!!!!!!!â
(Blam! Blam! âAaaaaaaagh!!!!!!â)
OK. Anyway, I think there is still an outside world.
I am getting electricity and the Internet is working. The phone is dead though. I donât dare leave the house.
Oh, Iâm sorry. I forgot to mention that I am getting attacked by blood maddened zombies.
They have the place surrounded and have since night fell.
Donât ask me where they came from or why.
I surely canât get any of them to explain it. All they do is go âAaaaaargh. Errrrrr!!!!!â and drool a lot. Once in a while you can get one of the higher IQ ones to say âWant brains!! Hunger! Urghhhhhhh!â
(Sound of wood splintering.) âAaaaaargh! Want brains! Errrrr!â
Aha, speak of the Devil, there is one of the Mensas now. âMAYBE THIS BASEBALL BAT WILL TEACH YOU SOMETHING!!!!! (Smack!!) THERE YOU BIG SLUG! NOW YOU CAN PICK YOUR ARM UP OFF THE FLOOR AND TAKE IT WITH YOU!!!!!!â
âOooooorgh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!â
These zombies just donât know when to let up.
There are so many of them. They must be breeding like flies.
Or however they make more.
They certainly are annoying.
(Sound of glass breaking) âUrggggg! Garrrrrrrrr!!!!!â
Man, donât they ever sleep? âHEY HANDSOME, EVER MET A MEAT CLEAVER BEFORE! LET ME INTRODUCE YOU!!!!!â (Slash) âAaaahhhhh! Ahhhhhhh!â
Iâll say one thing for them, these zombies are real party animals. Itâs three in the morning and they are still coming. They must be taking some really good vitamins. I had better not let down my guard for a moment.
(Crash! Splinter) âAaaaargh! Bwaaaaahhhhh!â
âOW, YOU BASTARD!!!!! YOU GOT MY ARM!!!!â Blam! Blam! Blam Blam! CRIMINY! THESE THINGS JUST DONâT KNOW WHEN TO DIE! FOUR SHOTS IN THE FACE BEFORE HE FINALLY FALLS!â
Nuts. Iâll have to type one handed now. Any more of this and Iâll be typing with my nose.
Phew! I feel a little funny now. Iâm glad I still have you to have contact with. I can tell this night is going to be a long one.
Aaargh! What is wrong with me? I feel like I am slipping a way. Errrr!!! Getting hard to tyyypppeeeeâŠâŠâŠ
Uuuughhhh! Hand âŠ.no⊠work âŠ.. rightâŠâŠ.
âŠâŠâŠâŠ.
âŠâŠâŠâŠ.
(Splinter, crash, smash) âAAAAAAARGHHH!!!!!! DONâT NEED COMPUTER!!!!! SMASH!!!!! (Smash!) HELLO MY BROTHERS!!!!! ME WANT BRAINS!!!!!! HUNGER!!!!!!!!!! URGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
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