Comedy from the Borscht Belt!


I don’t want to beet around the bush — but Russians do have a sense of humor. And here for comedy night, one of those jokesters just climbed up on stage…

“And now, straight from The Kiev Kiosk — here’s the top female comic in the USSR… Buffy Korsekov”!


You guessed it — my comedy idols are The Marx Brothers… Groucho & Karlo!


I don’t need this you know — I could go home and clean… Missiles!

My last gig was the “Mike Flynn Lifetime Achievement Dinner” — no Caviar…Turkey on a Ritz!

This is a tough crowd!

You know, Russia is so cold — but, it’s a dry cold!

It’s so cold — babies are born with an electrical cord!

I’m not kidding — it’s so cold we wear mittens in foreplay!

Our blankets have 2 settings — 3 Dog Night & Olga!

I see I’ve found the level of this crowd!

In Russia, we have magazine just like Cosmopolitan with catchy subtitles on the cover:

“The Ugly Flat Stomach… how to get rid of it forever!”

“Fat Cells — the gift that keeps on giving!”

And, “You’re Not Just Getting Better…you’re getting bigger!”

Sit down, Mom!

What do I think of Mrs. Trump?  Ha — I’ve seen more meat in broth!

I dated the two Sergey’s after they visited the White house & both said the same thing.  “Great acoustics & sound levels!”

Don’t laugh — that’s normal Pillow Talk in Russia!

But, Ambassador Kislyak was bored and said, “Spying is too easy these days — Trump showed me the friggin key under the mat to let me in!”

Do I think Trump was in cahoots with Putin — ha!  Mrs. Putin hasn’t seen his cahoots in years!

Just kidding — I was doing this entire routine phonetically & wouldn’t know a cahoot from a cyber troll!

Start the car, Igor!

Folks — catch me next week at “The Beluga Bathhouse” — 1st 10 tickets get Golden Showers!

I’ve been great — thank you very much!

That’s better!

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Marilyn Sands

Marilyn Sands

Marilyn Sands is a former 80's Stand-Up Comic & Comic Booker. Sold Jokes to Joan Rivers & lesser lights. A Contributor to "Humor Times Magazine" while pitching her 2 Madcap Screenplays & a Stage Play about the 1st Off-Line Dating Site, 'Eden' where Adam & Eve get busy! Proud to announce her new book, "CAN YOU PEE OUTDOORS" On-Line Dating Straight Lines can be purchased now in Paperback & very soon as an ebook on It's for anyone who's ever been Single! And, she says, "If this piece of literature happens to turn up in your John as Toilet Humor - so be it. Who am I kidding - with a Title like I have - I wouldn't be surprised"!