[Disclaimer: This is a satirical news piece, just for fun, read at your own risk!]

Queen Dispatches 007 to Halt Meghan Markle and Prince Harry Interview

Exclusive Report: The Queen was desperate to stop the broadcast of the Prince Harry and Meghan Markle interview.

Dispatches from SNN (Slobovian News Network)

A shocking report reveals that, in an unprecedented and desperate move to stop the much heralded and advertised television interview of former Royal family members Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, Queen Elizabeth personally dispatched famed British Secret Service agent James Bond to quash the interview by any means necessary — including using his license to kill.

Meghan Markle and Prince Harry InterviewThe queen, fearful that the duo would spill British Royalty and Government secrets, has dubbed them as traitors. She has stripped them of all titles and defuncted their royal salaries and allowances.

SNN has learned that Slobovian News Network head Andreas Pissebukkette has offered the husband and wife team positions as reporters on SNN’s highly popular entertainment show “Hollywood Schitte.”

Unbeknown to the British, the Oprah Winfrey Organization had hired Slobovian Secret Servive agent and former Olympic sextathlete Gerta Grabbo to protect Meghan and Harry.

Tipped off by double-agent 00234 as to the British dispatching of Bond, Agent Grabbo was able to intercept Bond, and disguising herself as Pussy Galore, threw Mr. Bond a one-woman orgy until the televised interview was over.

She then injected him with a newly formulated Slobovian Secret Service short term Amnesia drug.

According to Oprah Winfrey, “Mr. Bond will experience a short lapse of memory, fall asleep and then awaken thinking that he is George Lazenby.”

Ted Holland