Katy Perry Spent a Lot of Time Contemplating Her Super Bowl Act

High flying act by Katy Perry beat out other ideas

Katy Perry spent a lot of time considering what she would do for the Super Bowl. “Maybe I should do a French Kiss with another superstar like Brittany Spears and Madonna did. I wonder if Taylor Swift would be available for that? Or should I do an underwear-less limo exit like Brittany did that one time? That got a lot of coverage.”

Katy Perry with monkeyA lot of money and concern is spent by performers and by the NFL alike preparing for the biggest sporting event and one of the biggest entertainment shows of the year in the U.S. Almost anything goes for this colossal showcase which mixes the two key elements that made America great — show business and football. Almost anything…

A few years ago a huge scandal erupted when Justin Timberlake ‘accidentally’ ripped off a part of Janet Jackson’s ‘Wagnerian opera singer armor’ during a sexually charged song exposing one of her chief ‘womanly assets.’

This brought about a tornado of anger and accusations down upon the management of the Super Bowl and upon the television station portraying it. The NFL always has to keep in mind that they are still catering to a large segment of conservative religious elements of the U.S. especially on TV. Of course, deep down, it certainly didn’t hurt the money made from the show or from future Super Bowls. All of which gave Katy Perry a great idea.

“I know! I’ll have costume where both of my boob holders get ripped off by some guy — say someone famous like Shia LaBeouf or Taylor Lautner or Bill Cosby. Or, I KNOW! Better yet! I’ll have both my boobs painted like the pointy ends of footballs and have a pump so that they get even bigger by the end of the song!”

In the end, she settled for a ‘nude as is legally possible’ shower scene with both opposing teams fighting over both her and a football and a bar of soap in a wet and slippery cameo that would have surely set new Super Bowl standards. Unfortunately, the NFL got wind of it and axed it in its prime. Of course, higher up officials got bootlegs of the rehearsal sessions which are now selling for thousands on E-Bay.

Poor Katy had to settle for just being a comet that flew through the stadium.

Roger Freed