Stormy’s 60 Minutes of Fame – With ‘Going Rate’ Fees

What was Stormy really thinking during her 60 Minutes interview?

You saw the show – c’mon, you know you did! 

But, you didn’t see what Stormy Daniels was really thinking during her “60 Minutes” tell-all interview, nor the tallying she was doing of her ‘going rate’ fees for her time and trouble…

Stormy Daniels 60 Minutes

60 Minutes

TRUMP

Have you seen my new Magazine?

Braggadocio $50 bucks – Ka-ching

STORMY

Someone should take that magazine & spank you with it…give me that.

TRUMP

You wouldn’t.

Foreplay $50 bucks – Ka-ching

STORMY

Hand it over.  Turn around & drop ’em.

Easy Arousal $50 bucks – Ka-ching

STORMY

He pulled down his pants a little.  He had underwear on & stuff & I gave him a couple swats.

S&M Lite $50 bucks – Ka-ching

TRUMP

Wow, you…you are special. You remind me of my daughter.  You’re smart & beautiful & a woman to be reckoned with & I like you.  I like you.

‘Reminds him of relative Creep-Chat’ $50 bucks & Totally unnecessary compliments $50 bucks – Ka-ching

STORMY

I was in the restroom for a little bit & came out & he was sitting, you know on the bed – perched & he was holding his Emollient. (comedic license)

60 year-old Flaunting Flasher $250 bucks – Ka-ching

TRUMP

Got an idea, honey bunch.  Would you ever consider going on & being a Contestant?

Obligatory Sales Pitch $50 bucks – Ka-ching

TRUMP

My wife…don’t worry about that.  We don’t even – we have separate rooms & stuff.

‘The Little Woman @ Home doesn’t mind’ line $50 bucks – Ka-ching

STORMY

I had sex with him, yes.  Physically attracted to him, no.

Nauseous Sex $500 bucks – Ka-ching

STORMY

But, I didn’t say no, I’m not a victim, I’m not.

Make that $400 bucks – Ka-ching

STORMY

No, I didn’t use a condom.

Bareback Mountin’ – $1,000 bucks – Ka-ching

STORMY

No & I didn’t ask him to.

Make that $900 bucks – Ka-ching

STORMY

He said it was great, had a great evening & it was nothing like he expected.

‘Routine Departure Speech’ but with a question about getting his Tightie-Whities off the chandelier $50 bucks – Ka-ching

A phone call months later…

TRUMP

When can we get together again?  I just wanted to give a quick update for you on ‘The Show’…

STORMY

No thanks!

‘You didn’t even buy me breakfast/I thought it was a business deal’ Wake-up Call $$$Millions in publicity – Ka-ching

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Marilyn Sands

Marilyn Sands

Marilyn Sands is a former 80's Stand-Up Comic who started out in the DC/MD/VA area, moved to the Bay Area in Northern California and now resides in L.A. She has sold jokes to Joan Rivers, lesser lights and gag magazines, and is a screenwriter, playwright and author of non-fiction.