Dear Anonymous Sender: Thank You for Your Holiday E-Card

Although I cannot recall where I may have met and exchanged business or V cards with you (or someone from your organization), I am extremely grateful for your listserved holiday e-card that evaded our spam filters and wished me one or more of the following holiday greetings:

  • Holiday E-cardHappy Holidays to You and Yours
  • Seasons Greetings from Me and Mine
  • Happiest of Holidays from Your Fairest of Friends at ___
  • Most Seasoned of Greetings from Your Most Casual of Acquaintances at ___
  • Happy Greetings This Holiday Season
  • Holiday Greetings This Happy Season
  • This Season, Greet the Holidays Happily
  • May You Find Peace and Prosperity in the New Year
  • May Peace and Prosperity Find You in the New Year
  • Stop Looking Over Your Shoulder, It’s Just Peace and Prosperity Finding You
  • Let’s Not Get Hung Up on Hannukah or Cowed by Christmas: Happy New Year!
  • May You Shop Without Lines and Spend Within Budget This Season of Generous Re-Gifting
  • May You Wear Proper Attire to Your Office Party, Neither Too Dressy Nor Too Casual, And Not Insult Your Boss’s Spouse, Even Inadvertently, Like You Did Last Year!
  • Wishing You Health and Happiness, Peace and Prosperity, Wealth and Wassail, and Eggnog and Alliteration Throughout The Holiday Season and Into Q1 of Next Year
  • May The Presents You Receive This Holiday Season Bring Joy to Your Heart or, in the Alternative, Include a Gift Certificate and Free Returns
  • May Your Collection of Playful Christmas Ties, Tights and Sweaters Garner the Compliments – or at Least the Attention – You’ve Been Fishing For These Many Years
  • Cheery Christmas, Chappy Chanukah and a Chummy Chwanza!
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Howard Zaharoff

Howard Zaharoff

Howard Zaharoff reads (a lot), writes (mostly humor), teaches (occasionally) and practices law (doesn't everyone?). He is the author of "Stump Your Lawyer!" (Chronicle 2007), and his work has appeared in The Boston Globe, Wall Street Journal, Amazing Stories, Computerworld, The Journal of Irreproducible Results, The Annals of Improbable Research and the books Growing Up Jewish (Penguin 1987) and Sex As a Heap of Malfunctioning Rubble (and Further Improbabilities) (Workman 1993), among other places.