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Howard Zaharoff 
Most never suspected Walt Whitman would even consider the post of White House Press Secretary. Are you, Walt Whitman, prepared to affirm the truth of all I tweet or utter, even if I contradict myself … Read moreWalt Whitman’s Application for White House Press Secretary
The Mummy, Tom Cruise’s 2017 horror flick, had faux endings that just kept piling on top of one another. The Tom Cruise horror flick, The Mummy, has a long, laborious ending. When you’re watching, it … Read moreThe Dozen Endings of ‘The Mummy’ and What I Thought They Meant
Memorandum: Super Bowl LIII – Consider a Wider Range of Official Suppliers Date: January 12, 2019 From: NFL Properties, Committee on Suppliers and Sponsors To: National Football League RE: NFL 2019 Super Bowl LIII Sponsors … Read moreSuper Bowl LIII Update: Sneak Preview of NFL Official Sponsors
Although I cannot recall where I may have met and exchanged business or V cards with you (or someone from your organization), I am extremely grateful for your listserved holiday e-card that evaded our spam … Read moreDear Anonymous Sender: Thank You for Your Holiday E-Card
“The Persons, Who Evade From Checking Procedure, Aren’t Supposed for Boarding!” — Sign at Dnipropetrovsk International Airport (Ukraine) Welcome, boarding persons to Float Number 285, Ukraine Airlines. We fly Not-Stopping to London, Merry Olde England, … Read moreThe Persons, Who Evade From Checking Procedure, Aren’t Supposed for Boarding!
Hi! We love your house and want to be its next owners! We’re the couple that came in five minutes before your open house ended, trailing three adorable children, Biyu age 8, Moshe age 5 … Read moreWe Want Your House
Hey, guy in the next stall, get a clue! You can stop trying to hide your identity by tucking your shoes behind the bowl: I recognize your Stefano Ricci’s (also your cough), John, from Accounting. … Read moreNotes for the Fellow in the Next Stall
Liven up your Passover Seder with these new Passover parody tunes! For any of you looking to liven up a Passover Seder with some new Passover parody songs, here is my contribution to that genre … Read moreNew Passover Parody Songs
In his own imagination: Donald Trump, superhero! Here, the president lists all the things he would do, if needed: Smash through any locked doors using my shoulders and feet, like they do on NCIS. (I … Read moreThings I, Donald Trump, Would Do in Addition to Running Unarmed into a School
Two roads diverged on my Google Maps, And sorry I could not go where both led And drive one Tesla – lousy app! – I looked down one as shown on my lap To where … Read moreThe Route Not Taken