An exclusive anonymous expose on the pickpocket trade during a pandemic! Financial Update.
In the early days of Covid, being 6 feet apart while having this gig was really slim pickens for the pickpocket trade!
But since I wrote the original article in 2021, things are looking up – which is where I want you to be looking when I’ve got my hand in your pocket! haha
You see, I do ‘crowd work’ & if I’m out of work too long – my arthritis is murder – I can’t even open a pickle jar, let alone hail a cab!
‘Looks like we’re gonna get some rain’ is a favorite of mine. So is, ‘Look – another Chinese Spy Balloon’!
But, I feel so cheap when I do that!
(That ought to get me a few points in the lower floors of Heaven, don’cha think?)
Okay, things aren’t so good. Unfortunately, during the 3 year Covid time out – you folks picked up a few tricks of your own – like keeping a fake wallet in your back pocket to deceive the thief.
Just so you know, I don’t like to be referred to as a thief – I prefer a ‘Digital Entrepreneur’ or ‘Commerce Magician’.
And, I’m not a mugger – but those that are, know all about ‘Give-up Money’.
That’s when you folks divide your valuables up in case someone sticks you up.
In your bra you have the Hope Diamond, $1,000 in cash & Brad Pitt’s home phone number!
And, in your pocketbook you have a dollar, 4 buttons & Lint!
Of course, we don’t want it to be like Adam & Eve either – who kept everything in their Fig Leaves.
One wrong move or itch & it’s like hitting a Pinata!
Yes, thanks to Covid you folks wised up & don’t have the knee jerk reaction when ‘one of us’ yells in a crowd, ‘Someone stole my wallet’!
So, I guess it’s impossible to make an illegal living these days!
Oh well, I don’t know who this Model is – but maybe she has ‘Two 10’s for a 5’!
I SAID, ‘Oh well, I don’t know who this Model is – but maybe she has ‘Two 10’s for a 5’!
Photos: “Paper Moon” Tatum O’Neal & Ryan O’Neal.
For more laughs, don’t forget to read Part 1 here!
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