Sean Spicer’s Job Resume Un-Redacted!

Sean Spicer

Sean Spicer
1600 Pennsylvania Ave. Washington, D.C.
youcan’[email protected]

IMMEDIATE OBJECTIVE

Denny’s Host, Goat Herder or Monk!

LAST EMPLOYER

DonaldTrump.con

JOB TITLE

Excrement Handler!

WORK HISTORY

U.S. Navy.  Press Secretary.  Hide Nunes in the broom closet!

2 YEAR EXIT PLAN

Re-enlist or jump in the Potomac River!

EMOTIONAL STATUS

Pussy-whipped!

NICKNAMES

Artful Dodger.  Spinach-in-Teeth.  And, plain and simple!

BELIEFS

Santa Claus.  The Easter Bunny.  Vladimir Putin.

SPIRITUAL MANTRA

“Garbage in – Garbage out”.

OUTSIDE INTERESTS

Eating crow.  Masturbation.  Eating more crow!

EDUCATION

Used Car Salesman.  Trump U.  Clown College!

Sean Spicer clown college

LANGUAGES

Stutter.  Stammer.  And, sometimes Forked Tongue!

LICENSES

Fishing, Ass-kissing and Comedic 7-day-wait!

MEMBERSHIP AFFILIATIONS

Shriners.  Scientology-lite.  Red Hat Society Ladies!

3 REFERENCES

Wife.  Mother.  Mailman!

SKILLS

Thinking on feet.  Deleting Tweets.  Microsoft Word!

SPECIAL SKILLS

Evading.  Deflecting.  Bobbing & Weaving.

Oh, and works well with children!

***

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Marilyn Sands

Marilyn Sands

Marilyn Sands is a former 80's Stand-Up Comic & Comic Booker. Sold Jokes to Joan Rivers & lesser lights. A Contributor to "Humor Times Magazine" while pitching her 2 Madcap Screenplays & a Stage Play about the 1st Off-Line Dating Site, 'Eden' where Adam & Eve get busy! Proud to announce her new book, "CAN YOU PEE OUTDOORS" On-Line Dating Straight Lines can be purchased now in Paperback & ebook on amazon.com/dp/1733487409 It's for anyone who's ever been Single! And, she says, "If this piece of literature happens to turn up in your John as Toilet Humor - so be it. Who am I kidding - with a Title like I have - I wouldn't be surprised"!
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