Winning Over The Donald

It’s time to think outside the box and play to The Donald’s weaknesses.

For many Americans, these are scary days, as the unpredictable con man Donald Trump threatens both the nation and the world with his unceasing tweets and tirades.

The Donald
One plan: do whatever it takes to maximize The Donald’s time on the links.

Those in the media (or at least the mainstream media) figure it’s their job to challenge Mr. Trump’s fabrications, flip-flops and lies. Those on the left feel compelled to organize at the grassroots level and fight the president’s agenda one vote at a time. And even average citizens have been frightened into action in the form of rallies, marches and town hall meetings.

All this sounds great but, in fact, nothing much has come from these actions. Notwithstanding all the hard work done by reporters, commentators, protesters and marchers, President Trump carries on with his destructive plans for America and his fans remain faithful supporters. So what’s a nation under attack to do?

The problem is that the efforts to date have been directed at halting, or at least slowing, Trump’s actions by attacking him and his plans head on. This has had little effect since they only serve to anger Mr. Trump and to further secure his base.

Thus it’s time to think outside the box, ditch the plans currently in use and adopt what I like to call “alternative plans” to lessen the potential damage. And the way to do that is to play to Trump’s weaknesses.

My first proposal is to concentrate on The Donald’s love of golf. As it is, the Duffer-in-Chief already spends a significant percentage of his time on the links. Don’t forget; that’s time that he’s not trashing environmental regulations, cutting social welfare programs or cutting taxes for the rich.

The plan is to do whatever it takes to maximize Trump’s time on the links. The more golf he plays, the less harm he can do to the commonweal. Thus, it behooves anyone who owns a championship golf course to invite the president for a round or two of golf. If he’s jetting to St. Andrew’s in Scotland or Cabot Links in Canada, that’s good news for the rest of us.

Even if you don’t own a course, you can help by donating money to assist in this presidential golf promotion exercise. Donations can go to help buy The Donald fancier clubs, more powerful golf carts and more flattering golf togs. Anything to keep him golfing would help immeasurably.

Another approach is to get the president out on the stump again. You’ll notice that he loves reverting to campaign mode and speaking to the faithful at rallies throughout the land. All Democrats, liberals and other rational citizens need do is organize more of these rallies under the banner of faux-Trump supporters.

Organize events as often as possible and fill them with folks pretending to adore Mr. Trump and every pronouncement he makes. It might be hard at first but most of us have at least some acting ability and should be able to convincingly pander to the president. And don’t worry; these events are like catnip for Trump. Organize them and he will come.

Finally, let’s not forget Trump’s giant, outsized ego. This is a man who loves to be loved and will go out of his way to accept praise and acclaim. It would therefore help immensely if those looking to mitigate the Trump effect would swallow their pride and send some love his way.

That means writing to the president and extolling his virtues. It means stroking his ego with on-line comments or letters to the editor. And it also means tweeting, facebooking and instagramming nonstop exalting Mr. Trump and his “accomplishments.”

The more encomiums, panegyrics and even on-line “likes,” the better. Like a moth to a flame, The Donald will spend time reading every single one. With any luck, he’ll be spending all his waking time golfing, campaigning and reading flattery and we can make it to 2020 unscathed.

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