In another galaxy far, far away, or Mar-a-Lago… former President Donald Trump just can’t resist taking credit and claiming ownership of inner or outer space!
10. IT TOOK OFF 6 MONTHS AGO ON MY WATCH! Gotcha!
9. THEY FOUND 11,780 TRUMP VOTES!
8. JUST LIKE THE NASA TECHS, MELANIA ALSO DESCRIBES OUR WEDDING NIGHT AS ‘SEVEN MINUTES OF TERROR’! It was eight!
7. I COULD’VE QUIT LIKE NIXON – BUT NO, I HAD ‘PERSERVERANCE’ & STAYED FOR THE RIOT!
6. I BOUGHT NASA. BEFORE I LEFT, I SKIMMED A LITTLE OFF THE TOP…2 SETS OF BOOKS!
5. I SENT AHEAD 100 RED TIES TO THE RED PLANET ADDRESSED TO ‘CITIZEN TRUMP SOUVENIR KIOSK’! SOLD 2 ALREADY! What a solar system!
4. I HAVE PROOF THE TIES WERE DELIVERED – AMAZON SENT ME AN EMAIL BACK FOR 2 DAY SHIPPING. Okay, 2 Stopovers Moon & Sun!
3. THANK ME LATER. ON BOARD WERE ALL RECORDINGS OF THE IRRITATING SONG, “IT’S A SMALL WORLD AFTER ALL”!
2. I’M NOW HAPPY! MY GOAL WAS SEARCHING FOR SIGNS OF ANCIENT LIFE & MARILYN SANDS BIRTH CERTIFICATE!
AND the #1 Reason why I am not yet taking credit for the Mars Mission…
CRUZ, GRAHAM & McCARTHY ALL SAY THEY HAVEN’T FINISHED PROBING ME YET!
- Take this Mandatory Test to See If You’re Qualified to Vote - April 16, 2024
- You Can’t Make This Stuff Up: A Mr. Pecker at a Porn Star Trial! - April 14, 2024
- How to Tell if Someone’s in a Cult: Top 10 - April 2, 2024
