Trump Tries to Give His Re-Election a Bounce with Laundered Money

laundered money

laundered money

Will Trump’s laundered money pay off or just cause him to lose a sock?

Donald Trump says he will spend $100 million of his own money for re-election or whatever it takes (including laundered money), “We have to win”!

Let’s listen in as Trump greets his long-time laundromat employee Ricky, who’s busy fluffing & folding…

DONALD TRUMP

Hiya Ricky – here’s this week’s batch – as usual, no starch!

RICKY

Right on it, boss.

TRUMP

Oh, here’s an old Taj Mahal Casino chip – give me a clean 20 – I have a McDonald’s run.

taj mahal

RICKY

Sure, here’s one – kinda used, a little Downey on the rinse cycle.

TRUMP

How long you with us, Ricky?

RICKY

Let’s see – your father, you & then Jared – a long time.

TRUMP

And, you got the Christmas Bonus?

RICKY

Yes & the ‘Bed, Bath & Beyond’ coupon.

TRUMP

And, the family – how’s little Jimmy?

RICKY

Diego’s a grandfather, but thanks for asking.

TRUMP

So, you’ve kept your mouth shut all these years – how do you do it?

RICKY

Well, you said I could keep the ones that look like John McCain…for my Retirement, you said.

TRUMP

Yes, someday I’ll be gone & you can use them – but not yet!

RICKY

I’ve been tempted, believe me.

TRUMP

Trust!  You trust me & I trust you.

RICKY

Yes, but this basement’s damp & depressing!

TRUMP

You want me to win again, don’t you?  Well, now you’re gonna have to work overtime – I need a boatload – by yesterday!

RICKY

Have I ever let you down?

TRUMP

Well, you just gave 5 Stars to Michael Cohen’s book!

michael cohen

RICKY

I’m learning my English – it’s a Good Read!

TRUMP

Still learning – what’s taking you so long?

RICKY

Don’t you remember – you told me to use your Sharpie & fill in ‘In Trump We Trust’!

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