Dispatches from SNN (Slobovian News Network)
“To avert civil war,” Biden signs executive order to build concentration camps for the unvaccinated.
Stating that he is concerned by the ever increasing likelihood that soon a civil war will break out between the vaccinated and the unvaccinated, President Joe Biden issued Executive Order X, which states that beginning on February 15,2022, all unvaccinated citizens will be seized by US Marines and US Marshals and herded into COVID 19 concentration camps.
Biden stressed that guests of the camps will retain the right not to be vaccinated, while being subjected to daily testing instead. They will also retain the right to remain unemployed.
In a rare move, President Biden extended an olive branch to the rival Republican nation and tapped renegade Georgia Senator Marjorie Taylor Greene to oversee the camps, stating that she is uniquely qualified, due to her love of authoritarian rule.
The President stated that before settling on Senator Greene, he considered Donald Trump, Barney Fife, Col. Wilhelm Klink, Simon Legree and Satan for the position.
The Island of Poontanngge is best known for inventing unprotected sex.
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