[Disclaimer: This article is satire, or what we used to call "fake news" before actual fake news started poisoning the political discourse!]
The Trump campaign, out of sheer desperation, will soon be unveiling some creative new slogans. In an exclusive scoop, we reveal them here for you!
New Mottoes for the Trump Campaign:
Be a Chump for Trump!
Donald Trump – The Forrest Gump of Politics.
Trump – Bringing America to Its Knees (or at least its hot, young women!)
Making America Better by Making Donald Trump Richer.
Donald Trump – The Bull in the China Shop Has Left the Building.
Trump’s New National Anthem – Oh Beautiful for Specious Lies!
Promising a Casino in Every American Town.
Melania Trump – Very Different Historic Photographs of a First Lady
Trump – Not only a new President but a new religion.
Making America Safer for Rich People.
Who Needs to Go Offshore Anymore – The Whole U.S. Is Now Our Personal Bank!
Trump – Never Give An Inch (unless its sexually).
What Happens in the White House Stays in the White House – From Here On.
What downtown Washington D.C. needs is a HUUUUUUUGE casino!
Donald Trump – The first Czar of America!
America – A nation of the wealthy, by the wealthy and for the wealthy with liberty and justice mainly just for them.
Donald Trump – Shouting ‘Bully’ just like the great Teddy Roosevelt, only with a different meaning.
Painting the White House pink just because he can.
Proving to America that he is a true believer because he loves the ‘In God We Trust’ on all his dollar bills.
Grabbing America Hard and Fast by The P**** and Never Letting Go!
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