Stunning Headline News - Ted Holland, Humor Times

Dispatches from SNN (Slobovian News Network)

No boring headlines here: nothing but Stunning Headline News!

In this Special Edition of SNN Dispatches, we present Stunning Headline News.

Breaking News

FAA declares airports in Newark, Atlanta and Washington D.C to be public nuisances — will close permanently

Breaking News

Donald Trump’s Birthday declared National Holiday

Breaking News

3 year old rapper Lady GooGoo arrested for sexual abuse

Breaking Trump News

President Trump Throws News Media off Air Force One, Leaves Them Stranded in Dhabu Abbi

Breaking News

Man who just bought Brooklyn Bridge to sue Mexican Navy for damages

Breaking Sports News

FBI to Investigate the Boston Celtics Losing to the New York Knicks

SNN Words to Live By

“Fun can’t lose.” — Academy Sports TV ad.

“If you mind your own business, you won’t be minding mine.” — Hank Williams Jr., Mind Your Own Business, 1980’s song.

“Ole Senorita Boolavoo Lanchovee Lavonga.” — Wynn Stewart, World Wide Traveling Man, 1970’s song.

The Question

If Chuck Berry Had Been White, Would Elvis Have Been Just Another Lounge Singer? (Leave your answer in the comments below!)

Author’s Pick: Two members of the Memphis Mafia threatened my life and told me, “Don’t Fuck with Elvis.”

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Ted Holland

Ted holland attended college for four years. The year that he bothered to go to class he studied history. He majored in throwing quarters in the jukebox in the Student Union canteen and minored in a girl named Marsha. His books include This Day In African American Musicand B Western Actors Encyclopedia.