At wits end, I’m finally ridding myself of Trump’s Daily Word Salad, including all the Old Trump Quotes!
Frankly, after writing 5 years worth of Trump satire…I need a Lobotomy!
Yes, it’s high time to clean out Trump’s idiotic quotes that linger in my frontal lobe! Just the thought of moving them from my left brain to the right is harder than you think – but that’s where you come in!
I took a few of Trump’s Quotes & attributed them to other people – the worst thing that can happen is you laugh!
“It really doesn’t matter what the media writes as long as you’ve got a young & beautiful piece of ass”!
“To be blunt – people would vote for me. They just would. Why? Maybe because I’m so good looking”!
“What you’re seeing & what you’re reading is not what’s happening”!
“I’ve always said, if you need Viagra, you’re probably with the wrong girl”!
“You know I’m automatically attracted to beautiful – I just start kissing them”!
“I look very much forward to showing my financials, because they are huge”!
“I think your country has tremendous economic potential”!
KIM JONG UN
“Well, I think our country does plenty of killing too, Joe”!
“Why can’t we use nuclear weapons”?
“We’re rounding ’em up in a very humane way, in a very nice way”!
DONALD TRUMP JR
“I want 5 children, like my family – then I will know that one will be guaranteed to turn out like me”!
“I’m under routine audit”!
“I don’t have any ties to the Saudi’s”!
“Well, you know I love to read. Actually, I’m looking at a book. I’m reading a book, I’m trying to get started”!
“We won with poorly educated. I love the poorly educated”!
“I’m not a schmuck. Even if the world goes to hell in a hand basket – I won’t lose a penny”!
“Show me someone with no ego & I’ll show you a big loser”!
“I too, have a nuclear button, but it is a much bigger & more powerful one than his & my button works”!
“I alone can fix it”!
(And, since I’m a little low on funds, darn Trump) “The best Taco Bowls are made in “Trump Tower Grill”. I love Hispanics”!
JOHN N. KENNEDY
“The worst thing a man can do is go bald. Never let yourself go bald”!
And…MELANIA TRUMP (January 20, 2021)
“Within a couple of days – one day, it’s like a miracle. It will disappear“!
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