A peek into Donald Trump’s (“Little Donnie”) childhood, documented by his poor mother!
Part 1
If we read between the lines we’ll get a better understanding of where Donald Trump’s personality quirks all started.
Dear Diary, here’s what happened today. Little Donnie brought a little friend over & left her on the porch.
DONNIE’S MOTHER
Well, bring her in Donnie!
MOTHER
And what’s your name, dear?
A LITTLE GIRL
Windy.
MOTHER
Wendy?
A LITTLE GIRL
No, Windy Daniels. There’s Sunny, Rayne & my brother Sleet!
I’m sorry!
MOTHER
Neighbor?
A LITTLE GIRL
No, other side of the tracks.
MOTHER
Donnie, what did I tell you!
DONNIE
Windy’s okay – I gave her 130,000 marbles for a peek at her panties!
MOTHER
You’re as bad as Pinocchio!
DONNIE
Pinocchio had work done!
MOTHER
Go to your room!
DONNIE
Can I take her?
WINDY RUNS BACK TO THE PORCH & DONNIE RUNS AFTER HER.
DONNIE
I’m getting punished so you don’t have to!
WINDY LEAVES & DONNIE’S MOTHER CALLS HIM INSIDE.
MOTHER
I always want to know everything – but just don’t advertise it, okay?
DONNIE
Don’t worry, I got my friend Vinny to keep it hush-hush!
MOTHER
Someday it’ll all catch up with you & you won’t have me to get you off the hook!
DONNIE
I alone can fix it! Like the Class President Election we had yesterday. I got all the votes!
MOTHER
I’m proud of you, son – how’d it happen?
DONNIE
I got chummy with our ‘Counter’ & suddenly had to go to his Grandmother’s funeral!
MOTHER
How many lawyers did you get this time?
DONNIE
Oh, I forgot to tell you – I had to go in your purse for a 20. You were on the phone! No, you were sleeping! Mom, I don’t have a Paper Route – remember I’m allergic to ink!
Dear Diary – Thank G-d he’ll grow out of it!
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