Little Donnie’s Ponzi Playdate #8

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Ponzi Playdate

Step right up folks & see the Con work the origins of The Art of the Deal with his Ponzi Playdate!

little donnie Ponzi Playdate

Little Donnie #8: Ponzi Playdate

MRS. TRUMP

Come downstairs right now, Donnie!

DONNIE

Hey, I’m dealing here!

MOM

Are your friends up there?

DONNIE

They’re not friends – they’re associates!

MOM

I hear your toy cash register ka-chinging.  Is Johnny Brown up there? His mother called.

DONNIE

Yes.  I’m suing him, but I want him in on this deal.

All the kids run down the stairs.

DONNIE (whispering)

These kids are buyin’ everything I say – I could be President!

MOM

I don’t think so!  I just heard you stole the teacher’s apple, she made you write your name 100 times on the blackboard & you asked for an Autopen!

DONNIE

Pfft.  She was a Sub – dumb as a rock.  Turn your head Mom, so I can seal my deal.

DONNIE

“Okay, Susie – give me 3 cents today & in 5 years I’ll give you back 6!”  “Tommy – today your nickel can buy you a ‘Baby Ruth’, but in 10 years I can get you a ‘Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup!'”

MOM

His father’s a Police Officer!

DONNIE

I’ll take off the Tariff.

MOM

Donald John!

The kids run out.

DONNIE

You’re crushing my dreams, Mom.

MOM

No, I’m trying to save the world.  Do you want to visit that nice doctor lady who asked you all that personal stuff?

DONNIE

No.  But I do love to see her blush every time I tell her I had to have my Circumcision done in two days because the Doc said he had to come back to finish!

MOM

That’s not true!   But I’m really, really sorry about the Mushroom thing.

DONNIE

You mean Dad doesn’t…

MOM

No, no – we’re having that for dinner.  What I mean is, you should talk to someone about the lying.

DONALD

What lying?

MOM (beating her head against the door)

I just want to try everything before you go off to Military School – they have guns there.

DONNIE

I don’t need guns, Mom – I have words.  The best words!

MOM

You’re just not right, son.

DONNIE

You’re no prize yourself – my words for today are, ‘Fake it until you make it’!

MOM

You won’t go far with that!

DONNIE

I’m in the Will, aren’t I?

MOM

It’s just a few million – what can you do with that?

DONNIE

A Casino.  A University.  An Airline.  ‘Trump Vodka’.  A Porn Star.  34 Conviction Fees.  Rape Conviction Fees.  ‘Epstein Assassin Fee’….Somebody stop me!  haha

Catch up with the whole ‘Little Donnie’ Series here!

Marilyn Sands
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