A recent meeting in the Oval Office:
Mike Pence: Mr. President, I understand you’re looking to blame someone for this crazy pandemic.
Donald Trump: That’s right, Mike.
Mike Pence: Well, then, who’s to blame?
Donald Trump: Yes, exactly. WHO’s to blame.
Mike Pence: That’s what I’m trying to help you with. Clearly someone is at fault and we’ve gotta figure out who.
Donald Trump: We know it was WHO. The question is how.
Mike Pence: I’m not following you, Mr. President. Until we know who did it, we can’t figure out how.
Donald Trump: Sometimes you’re as dumb as Eric, Mike. I told you; WHO is to blame. W-H-O. Who.
Mike Pence: Well, as I recall, you’ve often blamed Obama. Is he the one responsible?
Donald Trump: Of course he shares the blame but WHO bears the most responsibility.
Mike Pence: I don’t know sir. What about Hillary? Is she to blame?
Donald Trump: Sure, both her and Xi could be behind this. But WHO for sure.
Mike Pence: Maybe you’re thinking of China. Are they to blame?
Donald Trump: Obviously, Mike, but WHO is the worst.
Mike Pence: I thought you always said the Democrats were the worst. Maybe we should blame the Dems.
Donald Trump: That’s a no-brainer, Mike, but WHO has to take the lion’s share of the blame.
Mike Pence: I’m not following you, Mr. President. I’ll try to think outside of the box. Maybe it has something to do with Putin?
Donald Trump: Something you put in a box? What kind of nonsense is that, Mike?
Mike Pence: No, your friend from Russia, Putin.
Donald Trump: I don’t have a Russian friend to put in a box. What the hell are you talking about?
Mike Pence: Well maybe it was that guy up north, Justin.
Donald Trump: Just in? What’s just in?
Mike Pence: No, sir, I hate to correct you but it should be who’s Justin.
Donald Trump: Yes, obviously. WHO’s just in as the prime candidate. Don’t take this the wrong way, Mike, but you can be awfully thick sometimes.
Mike Pence: OK, let me just make one more suggestion. As for someone to blame, could it be Sessions?
Donald Trump: You mean the sessions of Congress? That’s a possibility but I think the governors are a better choice. But if you want a prime candidate at fault then I still say it’s WHO.
Mike Pence: I give up, Mr. President. If we keep going, I will be at a loss.
Donald Trump: Maybe you’re right, Mike. Maybe we should blame Wilbur Ross or Betsy DeVos or…….
Mike Pence: Goodnight, Mr. President.