Biden prepares for a real-life ‘Home Alone,’ as Trump booby traps the White House.
For the last week, President Trump has been holed up in his White House bedroom, watching Home Alone, replaying the part where Kevin booby traps the house against would-be robbers.
It’s no secret that the President and top White House officials are doing their best to sabotage President-elect Joe Biden’s agenda once he takes office. Policies like reducing the number of troops in Afghanistan, securing drilling in Alaska, and punishing China, will make it hard for the Biden administration to change direction. But President Trump has taken his efforts a step further.
“Operation Booby Traps” is highly classified, but a source close to Trump felt compelled to issue this warning out of concern for Biden’s safety: “President-elect Biden should invest in a new desk chair, a tear gas mask, a hard hat, and a pair of no-slip socks.” The source also recommended that Biden be up to date on all vaccinations including tetanus, hepatitis, and Ebola.
Members of the GOP embraced the President’s initiative by putting out this statement: “Policy alone may not be enough to obstruct the will of the majority of this country. We must act preemptively – even if it means roughing “Sleepy Joe” up a bit.”
As for President Trump, he was last seen crawling around on his hands and knees on the White House lawn. When asked what he was doing he said he was planting “forget me nots.”
News of the President’s “gardening” may have been leaked to Biden, who reportedly enrolled Champ and Major in a bomb sniffing class.
When asked if he was concerned about the booby traps, the President-elect replied: “Here’s the deal: I’ve been knocked down more times than Muhammad Ali. Joey always gets back up. Bring it on.”