A Writer’s Day
How one writer avoids writer’s block: Avoid writing! Wake up, brew strong, black tea. Read newspaper. Sort through bills. Take out trash. Say goodbye to wife, kids. Brew … Read more
humor
Nothing to Fear but Fearmongers
The scariest thing about political fearmongers is themselves One thing you can say about Rick Perry is that he sticks to his guns. If one of his policy … Read more
Lost Journal: The Halloween Costume Piece Accords of 1973
Journal entry: October 31, 1973 (age 4) – Halloween Costume Accords As I admired my new Halloween costume in the mirror, I said, “Ri ruv Ralloreen.” To play Scooby-Doo, … Read more
Human Robocall Machine Breaks Down
Woman suffers PST after making thousands of anti-Mitch McConnell robocalls A California woman is resting comfortably in LA General Hospital after suffering an ailment that until now had … Read more
Scary Masks: Midterm Elections and Halloween
The midterm elections and Halloween are similar: both events highlight tricks and treats Hey everybody. The Midterms Are Coming! Or rather: the midterms are coming. To be most … Read more
Marriott Hotel’s Shameful Tipping Scam
Here’s a ‘tip’ for you, Marriott: pay better than slave wages! As an old popular song from the 1970s asks, what do you get if you “work your … Read more
Riots and Mayhem After Scientists Announce Lab-Grown Penis
‘Designer Dicks’ to be tested on penis-envying volunteers WINSTON-SALEM NC — Civil unrest broke out today at the gates of the Wake Forest Institute for Regenerative Medicine, Winston-Salem, … Read more
Why I’m Not Going on the Lena Dunham Circus Book Tour
I won’t be an opening act for Lena Dunham’s new book tour. Here’s why. I’m not that kind of girl. I hate taking off my clothes in public. … Read more
Lost Journal: First Impressions of a Third-Grade Talent Show
Journal entry: February 18, 1977 (age 7) – Talent Show Tiddly, winky, winky, winky Tiddly, winky, woo I love you. This kind of groveling before the judges was … Read more
Career Fair Day with ISIS
Surprise recruitment effort at recent Career Fair featured offers of free caps, t-shirts and Facebook pokes The annual Cornell University Career Fair Day provides an opportunity for students … Read more
