Halloween

Top 10 Ways to Get Rid of Candy Corn after Halloween!

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Top 10 Ways to Get Rid of Candy Corn after Halloween!
Marilyn Sands
Marilyn Sands
Marilyn Sands is a former 80's Stand-Up Comic & Comic Booker. Sold Jokes to Joan Rivers & lesser lights. Was up one night & wrote 2 Madcap Screenplays & a Stage Play. Her hilarious book "CAN YOU PEE OUTDOORS" On-Line Dating Straight Lines is on amazon.com/dp/1733487409And, "OWNING THE STAGE, RENTING THE BALLS"!My Life as a Funny Girlis on amazon.com/dp/1733487417"Living proofyou don't have to be a success to write a Memoir"!And yes, this bio is my OBIT too!haha
Marilyn Sands
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It’s neither candy nor corn, but we have a Love/Hate relationship with it! Look, if Candy Corn wasn’t healthy for us we would’ve heard by now, right? Me?  … Read more

Ripping the Headlines Today, 11/7/22

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Ripping the Headlines Today, 11/7/22
Paul Lander
Paul Lander
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Paul Lander
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Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news, even that about the day after Halloween candy sales, doesn’t need to be complicated and … Read more

Trump Suggests Arming Ukrainians with ‘Dangerous Fruits’

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Trump Suggests Arming Ukrainians with ‘Dangerous Fruits’
Ralph Lombard
Ralph Lombard
I was born a young baby. Then I grew up. Then I grew confused. Then I grew tired. I'm a 20th century man who's somehow been transported to the 21st century, with one foot in the gone past and the other in the here now. I started my blog mymanymoodsofme toward the end of 2012. There I write humorous essays, stories and poems (lyrics from my songs), in addition to my aphorisms. It's good work... if you get it. In my spare time I play chess, write songs, and reflect upon what I see. I'm very happy to be colluding with Humor Times, and hope you enjoy the result. Cheers!
Ralph Lombard
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Trump claims “dangerous fruits,” like those he railed against in a recent deposition, would “juice-up” Ukraine’s military. Criticizing President Biden’s response to the Russian invasion of Ukraine as … Read more

This Isn’t a Haunted House… It’s a Haunted Home!

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This Isn’t a Haunted House… It’s a Haunted Home!
William Vaillancourt
William Vaillancourt
William Vaillancourt's humor writing has appeared in Robot Butt, The Weekly Humorist & How Pants Work, among other places. Coincidentally, it has not appeared in other places as well.
William Vaillancourt
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A haunted house is one thing, but a haunted home can be much worse. Scarecrows lined our way through the field until we reached a maze of headstones, … Read more

Orange is the News Blackout: Halloween Greetings

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Orange is the News Blackout: Halloween Greetings
Dennis Rohatyn
Dennis Rohatyn
Dennis Rohatyn is a recovering philosopher who hibernates in Southern California. He writes about the inhuman condition, as he peers out from inside his lonely cave.
Dennis Rohatyn
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People in positions of authority suggest Halloween greetings for Trick or Treaters. With Halloween around the corner, it’s important for people who are in positions of authority to … Read more

Ripping the Headlines Today, 9/28/20

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Ripping the Headlines Today, 9/28/20
Paul Lander
Paul Lander
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Paul Lander
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, … Read more

Halloween in Des Moines

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Halloween in Des Moines
David Martin
David Martin
Dave's political satire and short humor have appeared in most major North American newspapers. He is also the author of several humor collections including "Dare to be Average", "Screams & Whispers" and "King Donald I" available on Amazon.
David Martin
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Iowans should be wary of running into one these scary creatures in Des Moines on Halloween night. The Iowa caucuses are months away but already Democratic presidential candidates … Read more

The Vampire and the Vamp

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The Vampire and the Vamp
Roger Freed
Roger Freed
rfreed has a fertile, if somewhat warped, imagination. Read him at your own risk! More laugh gaffes available at Semi-Humorous Humor
!!!!!Buy 'The Alaska Papers' from lulu.com. Only $10 !!!!! An almost funny publication!
Roger Freed
Latest posts by Roger Freed (see all)

A Halloween tale of the Vampire and the Vamp The vampire waited patiently, ravenously in the dark alley. His never ending thirst was a suction within himself that … Read more

Don’t Feel Up to Carving and Cleaning Your Pumpkins? Let Vegan Zombies Do It for You!

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Don’t Feel Up to Carving and Cleaning Your Pumpkins? Let Vegan Zombies Do It for You!
Roger Freed
Roger Freed
rfreed has a fertile, if somewhat warped, imagination. Read him at your own risk! More laugh gaffes available at Semi-Humorous Humor
!!!!!Buy 'The Alaska Papers' from lulu.com. Only $10 !!!!! An almost funny publication!
Roger Freed
Latest posts by Roger Freed (see all)

Save yourself the mess and the stress of making your families jack-o-lanterns this Halloween; let Vegan Zombies do it for you! Our non-brain eating team of eager un-deads … Read more

NEW! Just in Time for Halloween Snacking! The ‘Gourmet Zombie Guide to International Fine Dining’!

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NEW! Just in Time for Halloween Snacking! The ‘Gourmet Zombie Guide to International Fine Dining’!
Roger Freed
Roger Freed
rfreed has a fertile, if somewhat warped, imagination. Read him at your own risk! More laugh gaffes available at Semi-Humorous Humor
!!!!!Buy 'The Alaska Papers' from lulu.com. Only $10 !!!!! An almost funny publication!
Roger Freed
Latest posts by Roger Freed (see all)

A zombie fine cuisine guide to Halloween snacking. Due to the success of our hugely popular Gourmet Zombie Guide to Fine Dining in America, we are coming out … Read more

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