First Suicide Bomber Union Formed In Iraq
Initial union meeting described as a ‘real blast’ Union-minded Iraqis today formed the Suicide Bombers Local #467 in Baghdad, but promptly had to look for a new union … Read more
fake news
Mark Zuckerberg Begs Businesses to Quit Giving Him Free Stuff
‘Enough already with the gifts,’ says Facebook’s Zuckerberg, ‘and don’t Poke me either’ Ever since Mark Zuckerberg joined the ranks of the uber rich, he’s been receiving free … Read more
Charlton Heston Rises from the Grave to Promote “Guns, Guns, Guns” in Wake of Batman Shooting
‘Guns don’t kill people, crazy fools we let buy them do’ — Charlton Heston’s zombie The iconic movie matinee idol Charlton Heston has risen from the dead like … Read more
Expert Says Moldy Bible Likely Source of Michele Bachmann Outbursts
Batsh*t crazy? Minnesota congresswoman has an excuse, signed by her doctor: The mold made her do it As the calls continue to mount for Michele Bachmann to apologize … Read more
A Strange and Sordid Mystery: Hardcore Environmentalists Support Fracking in California
A strange new development has occurred in the continued battle between the oil industry and environmentalists over the use of fracking. Fracking, for those unfamiliar with the term, … Read more
‘Smart’ Chewing Gum Could Put America on Top in Education
A new startup company by the name of PharmaPend is in the business of seeking out passed over and forgotten scientific patent filings and developing them into name-brand … Read more
Monsanto Declares All Their GMO Crops Organic
‘We only splice organic genes’ says Monsanto CEO The biotech giant Monsanto today declared that all of their GMO (Genetically Modified Organism) crops are officially organic. “Since we … Read more
Photos of Mitt Romney in Tea Bag Speedo Emerge
Less than a week after Mitt Romney and his family returned from vacation in New Hampshire, photos have begun emerging showing a relaxed Mittster soaking up the sun … Read more
Bohemian Grove Gathering to Include Makeovers and Pillow Fights
This year, the infamous gathering at the Bohemian Grove will include activities for those unsalted crackers who want to embrace their feminine side The secret is out. This weekend … Read more
Republicans Not Sure Which Grover to Follow, Norquist or the Muppet
Republican lawmakers have been pretty gung-ho these past couple years to sign the Taxpayer Protection Pledge penned by Conservative Lobbyist and smarmy ringleader, Grover Norquist. The pledge essentially … Read more
