Obama: Drone Strikes “Not Lip-Synced”
‘Drone strikes deaths performed live’ says prez WASHINGTON D.C. — Following the controversial lip-syncing performance by singing sensation Beyonce Knowles at the inauguration a couple weeks ago, a … Read more
satire
Barack Hussein Obama 2013 State of the Union Drinking Game
What you need to play the State of the Union Drinking Game: To play the State of the Union Drinking Game, you need four taxpayers of any sex … Read more
Justin Bieber Seeks Counseling after Suffering from Normal Thoughts
“I’m crazy, I’m nuts. Just the way my brain works. I’m not normal.” — Justin Bieber LONDON, ONTARIO — In a highly publicized press conference yesterday, Scooter Braun, … Read more
Hemp: A Common Sense Crop for America’s Common Good
Hemp, hemp, hurray for a crop that could deliver a new economic high for America! Four years ago, Michelle Obama picked up a shovel and made a powerful … Read more
2023: With Half of America Shot, NRA Still Opposing Gun Control
Timeline – April 23, 2023. Place – Washington, D.C., or what is left of it. The National Rifle Association (NRA) and Congress again face off against each other … Read more
So God Made a Farmer: The Sequel
Yes, the Dodge trucks commercial using the late Paul Harvey‘s 1978 speech “So God Made a Farmer” resonated with millions of viewers and was voted one of the … Read more
Jon Stewart Channels Dr Seuss: ‘They do not like you, Barack Obama’
‘They do not like you, Barack Obama, on a train, a plane or a llama’ – Jon Stewart, in one of the great segments on The Daily Show … Read more
Axe-Wielding Hitchhiker Hero Inspires Copycats
Misfits nationwide take up ‘hitchhiker hero stereotype-defying’ mantle A homeless axe-wielding drifter turned out to be a hitchhiker hero this week, and is now inspiring copycats. Kai – the … Read more
Charlie Sheen to Run for President on ‘Winning’ Ticket
Politics: The obvious next move for the silver-tongued Charlie Sheen NEW YORK — In a surprising move yesterday, Adonis Charlie Sheen announced that he would run for POTUS … Read more
Lost Journal: Special BONUS Column Commentary
Journal entry: January 29, 2008 (age 38) Hi, my name is Tim Mollen, and I’m the writer of “Lost Journal.” Welcome to the special, bonus commentary track for … Read more
