Mars

Let’s Send All Billionaires to Mars!

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Jim Hightower
Jim Hightower
National radio commentator, writer, public speaker, and author of the book, "Swim Against The Current: Even A Dead Fish Can Go With The Flow," Jim Hightower has spent three decades battling the Powers That Be on behalf of the Powers That Ought To Be - consumers, working families, environmentalists, small businesses, and just-plain-folks.

Twice elected Texas Agriculture Commissioner, Hightower is a modern-day Johnny Appleseed, spreading the message of progressive populism all across the American grassroots.

He broadcasts daily radio commentaries that are carried in more than 150 commercial and public stations and on the web.
Jim Hightower
Latest posts by Jim Hightower (see all)

Why not just send our “genius” billionaires to Mars, and let them report back? Unfortunately, in the short time we homo sapiens have existed on this 4.5-billion-year-old Planet … Read more

Ripping the Headlines Today, 12/21/21

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Ripping the Headlines Today, 12/21/21
Paul Lander
Paul Lander
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Paul Lander
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news, even that about a humongous pot brownie, doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s … Read more

Visitors from Outer Space?

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Visitors from Outer Space?
JC Wade
JC Wade
J. Wade is a retired Chief Financial Officer from Missouri. He has had humor articles published in the Humor Times, USA Today, The Journal of Irreproducible Results and Unhinged Magazine, which is now defunct (not his fault).
JC Wade
Latest posts by JC Wade (see all)

Humor Times investigates: Are UFOs really visitors from outer space? Warning: This article is rated R for atrocious writing and offensive and insensitive stereotyping of space aliens and … Read more

Mars Could Fall from the Sky, Warn Scientists

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Mars Could Fall from the Sky, Warn Scientists
Ted Holland
Ted Holland
Ted holland attended college for four years. The year that he bothered to go to class he studied history. He majored in throwing quarters in the jukebox in the Student Union canteen and minored in a girl named Marsha. His books include This Day In African American Musicand B Western Actors Encyclopedia.
Ted Holland
Latest posts by Ted Holland (see all)

A thing called “reverse magnimosity” could cause Mars to fall from the sky, warns the Slobovian Space Program. Dispatches from SNN (Slobovian News Network) If you were planning … Read more

Oh No – UFOs!

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Oh No – UFOs!
JC Wade
JC Wade
J. Wade is a retired Chief Financial Officer from Missouri. He has had humor articles published in the Humor Times, USA Today, The Journal of Irreproducible Results and Unhinged Magazine, which is now defunct (not his fault).
JC Wade
Latest posts by JC Wade (see all)

Since 1947 there have been 80,000 sightings of UFOs with many clustered around National Marijuana Day. The past year has been hard on everyone with the pandemic, the … Read more

Ripping the Headlines Today, 3/23/21

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Ripping the Headlines Today, 3/23/21
Paul Lander
Paul Lander
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Paul Lander
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, … Read more

Ripping the Headlines Today, 9/22/20

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Ripping the Headlines Today, 9/22/20
Paul Lander
Paul Lander
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Paul Lander
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, … Read more

Getting Our Moon Back

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Getting Our Moon Back
JC Wade
JC Wade
J. Wade is a retired Chief Financial Officer from Missouri. He has had humor articles published in the Humor Times, USA Today, The Journal of Irreproducible Results and Unhinged Magazine, which is now defunct (not his fault).
JC Wade
Latest posts by JC Wade (see all)

In a wide-ranging interview, President Trump charged his new Space Force with getting our moon back from the Martians. President Trump recently tweeted that our moon is a … Read more

Elon Musk Reveals: Donald Trump is ‘Starman,’ Now Floating in Space

Elon Musk Reveals: Donald Trump is ‘Starman,’ Now Floating in Space
James Israel
Social media
James Israel
The Humor Times founder/publisher/editor/writer may wear a lot of hats, but he likes it that way. Still, his favorite job is writing fake news articles. He is also a musician and songwriter, who plays guitar, mandolin and harmonica, with several CDs to his credit.
James Israel
Social media
Latest posts by James Israel (see all)

SpaceX entrepreneur says he offered a “free space ride” to the president, and he took it. “He’s Starman now, and he’s in the driver’s seat, the way he … Read more

Ripping the Headlines Today, 10/6/15

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Ripping the Headlines Today, 10/6/15
Paul Lander
Paul Lander
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Paul Lander
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is … Read more

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