NFL

No End Zone in Sight for Ohio GOP Rep, a Former NFL Player

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No End Zone in Sight for Ohio GOP Rep, a Former NFL Player
Dennis Rohatyn
Dennis Rohatyn is a recovering philosopher who hibernates in Southern California. He writes about the inhuman condition, as he peers out from inside his lonely cave.
Latest posts by Dennis Rohatyn (see all)

Rep. Gonzalez will have no end zone celebration, as he is being blitzed by Republicans for daring to vote for impeachment. Pity poor Anthony Gonzalez. Congressman Gonzalez, who … Read more

Now for a Sports Post: Jimmy G vs Patrick M

Now for a Sports Post: Jimmy G vs Patrick M
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James Israel
The Humor Times founder/publisher/editor/writer may wear a lot of hats, but he likes it that way. Still, his favorite job is writing fake news articles. He is also a musician and songwriter, who plays guitar, mandolin and harmonica, with several CDs to his credit.
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Latest posts by James Israel (see all)

Okay, enough politics. Now for a sports post. Being a SF 49er fan, I just had to harp in on this with an uncharacteristic (for me) sports post, … Read more

More News That’s Unfit to Print

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More News That’s Unfit to Print
JC Wade
J. Wade is a retired Chief Financial Officer from Missouri. He has had humor articles published in the Humor Times, USA Today, The Journal of Irreproducible Results and Unhinged Magazine, which is now defunct (not his fault).
Latest posts by JC Wade (see all)

Unfit to Print: So we’ll just put it online. Goya, Oh Boya At a White House event earlier this month, Goya Foods CEO, Bob Unanue, remarked that Americans … Read more

Ripping the Headlines Today, 7/6/20

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Ripping the Headlines Today, 7/6/20
Paul Lander
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is … Read more

This is Your Brain on Aphorisms: Free Speech, Jail Brutality!

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This is Your Brain on Aphorisms: Free Speech, Jail Brutality!
Ralph Lombard
I was born a young baby. Then I grew up. Then I grew confused. Then I grew tired. I'm a 20th century man who's somehow been transported to the 21st century, with one foot in the gone past and the other in the here now. I started my blog mymanymoodsofme toward the end of 2012. There I write humorous essays, stories and poems (lyrics from my songs), in addition to my aphorisms. It's good work... if you get it. In my spare time I play chess, write songs, and reflect upon what I see. I'm very happy to be colluding with Humor Times, and hope you enjoy the result. Cheers!
Latest posts by Ralph Lombard (see all)

Police brutality leaves protestors aghast. Trump: The “flaw and disorder” president. Being insane isn’t all it’s cracked-up to be. Racists brutal lies with hate. Republicans always canspiracy the … Read more

Ripping the Headlines Today, 3/23/20

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Ripping the Headlines Today, 3/23/20
Paul Lander
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is … Read more

After Video Review, General George Custer Declared Winner of the Battle of the Little Big Horn

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After Video Review, General George Custer Declared Winner of the Battle of the Little Big Horn
Ted Holland
Ted Holland
Ted holland attended college for four years. The year that he bothered to go to class he studied history. He majored in throwing quarters in the jukebox in the Student Union canteen and minored in a girl named Marsha. His books include This Day In African American Musicand B Western Actors Encyclopedia.
Ted Holland
Latest posts by Ted Holland (see all)

Long-lost video of the Battle of Little Big Horn disqualifies Chief Sitting Bull, gives victory to General George Custer. Scientists at The University of Stanchk recovered a long-lost … Read more

Putin Forced to Plop Down on Couch, Unbutton Pants and Watch Crappy Detroit Lions

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Putin Forced to Plop Down on Couch, Unbutton Pants and Watch Crappy Detroit Lions
Dave Richards
Dave Richards is a writer from Las Vegas. In his spare time, he enjoys messing with HR Bots by optimizing keywords on Linkedin.
Latest posts by Dave Richards (see all)

After eating way too much Thanksgiving Dinner, President Putin nurses a food coma on the couch, watches Detroit Lions. After enjoying a Thanksgiving feast fit for a king, … Read more

Ripping the Headlines Today, 10/28/19

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Ripping the Headlines Today, 10/28/19
Paul Lander
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is … Read more

Aaron Rodgers’ Mustache Great for Lapping Up That Last Bit of Soup

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Aaron Rodgers’ Mustache Great for Lapping Up That Last Bit of Soup
Dave Richards
Dave Richards is a writer from Las Vegas. In his spare time, he enjoys messing with HR Bots by optimizing keywords on Linkedin.
Latest posts by Dave Richards (see all)

A study of Aaron Rodgers’ mustache has found it is the perfect substance for blotting up whatever’s at the bottom of your bowl. A Green Bay scientist has … Read more

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