Pope Francis Absolves ‘Humor Times’ and its Readers from Sin of ‘Coprophilia’
‘Humor Times is the only poop-free news outlet in North America,’ the Pontiff said, making the sign of the cross. ‘And its readers don’t eat up no horse … Read more
election
Augustus Trumpus
Trump is the American Putin, whom none dare criticize, for fear of retribution. All hail Augustus Trumpus! All hail the American Putin, whom none can criticize! All hail … Read more
Trump Lambastes ‘Humor Times,’ ‘Onion’ Editors in Two-Hour ‘Towering Rage’ Interview
‘Stop publishing the truth under cover of fake news!’ Trump screamed, threatening to sue. ‘Fake news should be fake! That means not true!’ NYC – At a “stormy … Read more
Tips on Avoiding Holiday Heartburn
How to skirt messy election questions at holiday dinners and preserve your sanity. And now a public service announcement for all you prodigal sons and daughters making the … Read more
Huge White Voter Turnout Myth vs Actual Lack of Dem Vote
The myth of a huge white voter turnout has been debunked. The real story is the lack of Democratic voters. Obama had far more. Okay, check this out. … Read more
Trump Transition Team: Minutes from Last Meeting Leaked
In this exclusive report, we bring you leaked minutes from the Trump transition team. Far-ranging discussion with the Boss and entire management team about White House toilet paper; … Read more
Churchill Thunders Against Trump from Beyond the Grave
‘Have you idiots learned nothing? America, your Munich is today. Stop Trump now or prepare for civil war! This is not a drill!’ – Churchill HEAVEN’S GATE — … Read more
Trump Election Victory Spurs ‘Dramatic Growth’ in Professional Protest Industry
Well-paid ‘pro pros’ trained in protest and ‘pussy rioting’ at cynically named ‘Trump University’ NYC – Donald Trump’s shock election victory has spurred a “dramatic growth” in what … Read more
Takeaways from the Election
2016 Election: Has our country gone completely nuts? No. There’s some good news. Buckle-up friends, it’s going to be a hairy ride. Start with Day One for President … Read more
If it Qualified for the Ballot, “None of the Above” Would’ve Won the Election in a Landslide
Who are these so-called Undecideds we keep hearing about in this election? Some of the great eternal questions are “What is the sound of one hand clapping.” “If … Read more
