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Alexander Vosh

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Alexander Vosh has lived in Rhode Island for all of his life, but is often asked where he grew up by other Rhode Islanders due to his lack of the state's R-optional accent - which will make an appearance on occasion, usually when Vosh is annoyed. Vosh is also highly allergic to right-wing politics, and thinks whisky is swell. He writes regularly for The Nil Admirari, where this story first appeared.

Jun 292016
 
 By , June 29, 2016

Benghazi is perfect place for fair and balanced presidential debate, according to Fox News CEO Roger Ailes.

WASHINGTON — Today, Fox News announced it wanted to host a presidential debate between Republican Donald Trump and Democrat Hillary Clinton in Benghazi, Libya. The spurious news network declared it would be the perfect place for Trump and Clinton to discuss American foreign policy sometime in October.

benghazi debate

Fox News scouts out site of Benghazi debate.

“Fox News has real journalists, and is not a propaganda network that incessantly disseminates right-wing talking points. Our team wants to give Americans the most fair and balanced debate between presidential candidates in the history America,” declared Fox News CEO Roger Ailes.

Ailes continued, “The one place that stuck out to us immediately as being a great debate location was Benghazi, Libya. It’s absolutely the perfect place for an equitable presidential debate with no political spin.”

“Everyone knows when Fox News runs a debate it never has a partisan agenda, and is only ever looking out for the best interests of the nation rather than a political party,” explained Ailes.

A reporter inquired about where in Benghazi Fox News was thinking about holding the debate.

“I think the former American diplomatic compound would be the ideal,” replied Ailes.

Hillary Clinton did not reply to requests for comment.

No effort was made to ask Donald Trump for comment.

Jun 242016
 
 By , June 24, 2016
Sarah Palin Hired as Trump Campaign Manager

The former half-term governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin, said she was “just so darn happy-proud.” WASHINGTON — Today, Sarah Palin was hired to be Donald Trump’s presidential campaign manager. Trump hired the 2008 Republican vice-presidential candidate and former half-term Governor of Alaska after firing Corey [more…]

Apr 272016
 
 By , April 27, 2016
Trump Wins Big with Americans Regretting Not Growing Up in 1930s Germany

Donald Trump pledges to blame socialists and Democrats when the Capitol Building is burned down shortly after he becomes president. WASHINGTON — Today, Republican presidential candidate and fascism-friendly billionaire Donald Trump dominated primary elections in Connecticut, Delaware, Maryland, Pennsylvania, and Rhode Island. In all five [more…]

Feb 152016
 
 By , February 15, 2016
Hillary Reminds Americans Wall Street Bribes Completely Legal

Defending her Wall Street connections, Clinton warns Americans not to be idealistic fools. WASHINGTON — Earlier today, Democratic presidential candidate and former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton reminded Americans the speaking fees and other forms of compensation she has received from Wall Street are completely [more…]

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