Ripping the Headlines Today, 1/5/16

Ripping the Headlines Today, 1/5/16
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Paul Lander
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is … Read more

Conspiracy Theories #3: More Nightmares to Ruin Your Sleep

Conspiracy Theories #3: More Nightmares to Ruin Your Sleep
rfreed has a fertile, if somewhat warped, imagination. Read him at your own risk! More laugh gaffes available at Semi-Humorous Humor
!!!!!Buy 'The Alaska Papers' from lulu.com. Only $10 !!!!! An almost funny publication!
Roger Freed

Our hard-hitting website investigates yet more conspiracy theories! Conspiracy Theories is the hard-hitting website that isn’t afraid to investigate and expose the dark forces that seek to prey … Read more

Predictions 2016

The New York Times says Emmy-nominated comedian and writer Will Durst “is quite possibly the best political satirist working in the country today.” The Humor Times says "Durst is the Sage of Satire, the Learned Lampooner, the King of Political Satire!" Check his website for upcoming stand-up performance dates. Will's books, including Elect to Laugh! A Hilarious, Common Sense Guide to American Politics are available at Amazon and better bookstores all over this great land of ours. From Ulysses Press.
Will Durst
Latest posts by Will Durst (see all)

Zero-waste policy: please cherry-pick your favorite predictions for 2016 and dump the rest. At the beginning of a new year, cultures all over the world traditionally perform peculiar … Read more

Jesus Shaves! Paul Ryan’s ‘Muslim Beard’ Sparks Shaving Craze Among Patriotic Americans

Jesus Shaves! Paul Ryan’s ‘Muslim Beard’ Sparks Shaving Craze Among Patriotic Americans
Michael was born in South Africa at the height of the apartheid era He quickly became involved in the underground resistance movement, knew Nelson Mandela and other prominent revolutionaries, some of whom later moved into privileged positions formerly occupied by whites. After several exciting escapes, he was forced to flee the country in disguise. He successfully made his way to the UK and gained his PhD at Cambridge on a university scholarship, He then pursued the dualcareer of college professor and social revolutionary, provoking academic and political mayhemwherever he went. Having thus failed miserably at both politics and education, he now cynically rails like Diogenes at the foibles of mankind in bitter satires and faintly subtly edgy political cartoons. History will, however absolve him. In 2006 he discovered a new Shakespeare play, but it's going to take a new generation to acknowledge it. Check out his website, Editorial and Political Cartoons.
Michael Egan

‘Facial hair is the work of Allah himself,’ proclaims new ‘Jesus Shaves!’ Republican movement, who criticize Paul Ryan. MOBIL, AL — Throughout Appalachia and the American south today … Read more

Hillary’s 2016 Resolution: Destroy Bernie and ‘Seem Nice While Doing It’

Hillary’s 2016 Resolution: Destroy Bernie and ‘Seem Nice While Doing It’
Alexander Vosh has lived in Rhode Island for all of his life, but is often asked where he grew up by other Rhode Islanders due to his lack of the state's R-optional accent - which will make an appearance on occasion, usually when Vosh is annoyed. Vosh is also highly allergic to right-wing politics, and thinks whisky is swell. He writes regularly for The Nil Admirari, where this story first appeared.
Alexander Vosh

“Sanders will not do to me what Obama did in 2008,” declared Hillary Clinton. WASHINGTON — Today, Democratic presidential candidate and former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton announced … Read more

Ripping the Headlines Today, 12/30/15

Ripping the Headlines Today, 12/30/15
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Paul Lander
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is … Read more

2016: What to Expect

The New York Times says Emmy-nominated comedian and writer Will Durst “is quite possibly the best political satirist working in the country today.” The Humor Times says "Durst is the Sage of Satire, the Learned Lampooner, the King of Political Satire!" Check his website for upcoming stand-up performance dates. Will's books, including Elect to Laugh! A Hilarious, Common Sense Guide to American Politics are available at Amazon and better bookstores all over this great land of ours. From Ulysses Press.
Will Durst
Latest posts by Will Durst (see all)

We here at Durstco have compiled a political forecast for 2016 It’s hard to believe, but we’re on the brink of another presidential election year. Let us pray. … Read more

Trump: When I Said ‘Disgusting’ I Meant it in a Good Way

Trump: When I Said ‘Disgusting’ I Meant it in a Good Way
Michael was born in South Africa at the height of the apartheid era He quickly became involved in the underground resistance movement, knew Nelson Mandela and other prominent revolutionaries, some of whom later moved into privileged positions formerly occupied by whites. After several exciting escapes, he was forced to flee the country in disguise. He successfully made his way to the UK and gained his PhD at Cambridge on a university scholarship, He then pursued the dualcareer of college professor and social revolutionary, provoking academic and political mayhemwherever he went. Having thus failed miserably at both politics and education, he now cynically rails like Diogenes at the foibles of mankind in bitter satires and faintly subtly edgy political cartoons. History will, however absolve him. In 2006 he discovered a new Shakespeare play, but it's going to take a new generation to acknowledge it. Check out his website, Editorial and Political Cartoons.
Michael Egan

‘Listen, I’m disgusting myself, OK?,’ Trump said, ‘You should just see me in the morning!’ NEW YORK – Presidential candidate Donald Trump yesterday defended his use of the … Read more

Is Hitler Still Alive? Mysterious Order from Amazon Jungle Fuels Speculation

Is Hitler Still Alive? Mysterious Order from Amazon Jungle Fuels Speculation
Michael was born in South Africa at the height of the apartheid era He quickly became involved in the underground resistance movement, knew Nelson Mandela and other prominent revolutionaries, some of whom later moved into privileged positions formerly occupied by whites. After several exciting escapes, he was forced to flee the country in disguise. He successfully made his way to the UK and gained his PhD at Cambridge on a university scholarship, He then pursued the dualcareer of college professor and social revolutionary, provoking academic and political mayhemwherever he went. Having thus failed miserably at both politics and education, he now cynically rails like Diogenes at the foibles of mankind in bitter satires and faintly subtly edgy political cartoons. History will, however absolve him. In 2006 he discovered a new Shakespeare play, but it's going to take a new generation to acknowledge it. Check out his website, Editorial and Political Cartoons.
Michael Egan

‘Lab Penis’ facility says request is not unique but its ‘aryan’ prescription ‘is unsual’ WINSTON-SALEM, NC — The Wake Forest Institute for Regenerative Medicine, which specializes in fake … Read more

And Quoth The Raven ‘Gimmee S’mores’

And Quoth The Raven ‘Gimmee S’mores’
rfreed has a fertile, if somewhat warped, imagination. Read him at your own risk! More laugh gaffes available at Semi-Humorous Humor
!!!!!Buy 'The Alaska Papers' from lulu.com. Only $10 !!!!! An almost funny publication!
Roger Freed

With apologies to Edgar Allen Poe for this blatant ripoff of his famous poem, ‘The Raven.’   Once upon a day bright and cheery, while I hiked a … Read more

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