Trump Announces Official White House News Outlet
Press secretary proclaims new era for ‘free press,’ thanks to the White House. Amid all the controversy over Trump’s war against the media, he made a stunning announcement … Read more
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Fake Inauguration Staged in Midst of Fake News Era
Editorial: What America witnessed today was not a legitimate inauguration, but a fake one, for an illegitimate president, the ‘yuuuge’ loser of the popular vote, who gave a … Read more
Inaugural Committee Made Last Ditch Effort to Dig Up Celebrity Attendants
Lacking any big name celebrities, the inaugural committee resorted to bizarre decision regarding Andrew Brietbart. With just days until the swearing in of Donald J. Trump to the … Read more
Brietbart Updates Company Health Care for Men
Brietbart rolls out circumcision reversal plan: “Making Employees Complete Dicks Again.” Brietbart News, better known for their alt-right white supremacist views than their concerns for peoples rights, announced … Read more
Trump Border Wall Plans Bring Surprise Economic Boom
Big changes in smuggling are predicted with the coming border wall Trump’s promise of building a border wall along the U.S.-Mexico border has been a boon to some … Read more
Trump’s List of Things to Do on His First Day in Office
He’s a business man, so you know Donald Trump has a list ready of things to do. Here they are. Have Hillary and Bill ‘mysteriously’ disappear. Finalize deal … Read more
Princess Ivanka ‘Furious’ About Pam Bondi’s White House Appointment
‘She just loves having her pussy grabbed by the President-Erect!’ Ivanka wept, referring to Donald’s new housemate, Pam Bondi. ‘It’s not fair! Waah!’ NYC – First Lady-Elect Princess … Read more
Future News: Royal Rumble Tarnishes President Trump’s Inauguration
Inauguration turns into wild melee as them damn ‘librals’ tarnish ‘Merca’ Following one of the most contentious political seasons in recent history, tens of thousands of Democrats gathered … Read more
Trump: ‘Jury Still Out’ on Laws of Motion; Media Not Sure
‘It’s little green gremlins that make things move,’ he said. ‘Believe me.’ But members of the media were quick to push back, saying not all gremlins are green. … Read more
New Year Baby 2017 Refuses to Be Born
‘I still have the Right to Choose,’ New Year Baby 2017 screamed. ‘At least for now!’ NYC – New Year Baby 2017 invoked Roe vs. Wade today, refusing … Read more
